in awkward homage to The Great British Bake Off.

“Good morning, Bolusers! It’s the semi-finals here at the Great Bolus Shake Down, so you know what that means. That means your endocrinologists will be requiring nothing short of perfection.”

“Yes, and not just your endocrinologist. This week, we’re also adding in your family, friends, and your insurance company as judges. Diabetes is nothing if not a family affair. It’s a full house here in the big, white tent.”

Signature Challenge
This challenge is for the amateur PWD to show off their tried-and-tested methodologies for bolusing they might do when eating with their friends and family.

Technical Challenge
This challenge requires enough technical knowledge and experience to produce a certain post-prandial blood sugar when given only limited – or even minimal – information. The PWD are all given the same meal to bolus for and are not told beforehand what the carb count will be. The finished blood sugars are judged blind and ranked by time-in-range and color of blood drop.

Showstopper Challenge
This challenge is for the PWD to show off their diabetes skills and prowess. Given a physical challenge, a terrible night’s sleep, and a very high stress environment, the PWD must maintain blood sugars that remain in-range and also don’t influence their emotional or physical outcomes. The judges favour a PWD that changes their lancet, works within perimeters, and has an undetectable c-peptide level.

“We’ve already done our first two challenges, and all four of our PWD are in the running for Star Boluser. The signature challenge round took place yesterday. Frederick, who has been Star Boluser three times already this season, started off well but his brunch bolus was derailed when he found out his cappuccino had raw sugar in it instead of a sugar substitute.”

“And in the technical challenge, our most veteran PWD Clara found herself faced with delayed restaurant meal technical challenge but emerged victorious by using an extended bolus to stay in-range.”

“Nice work, Clara!”

“But this morning, it’s time for our showstopper challenge. And today’s challenge is all about the variables. Our Bolusers will need to shoot for in-range numbers while dealing with potential layoffs at the office, a baby with a fever, six deadlines, and a broken coffee maker. There’s no time to truly focus on diabetes management; our PWD will need to go with the flow without going high or low.”

“It’s time to bring your Banting … and your Best.”

“Ready?”

“Set?”

“Boooooooluuuus!”

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