I have been trying to actively distance myself from the desire to dive deep into all the bad stuff that’s been going on lately.  Headlines get more and more distressing and humanity seems to have gone off the rails.  It feels gross to even watch the news because … well, the news is gross.  Everywhere.

Happy frigging holidays, right?

I’ve been in a little bit of a buzzkill cycle and I need to bust out of that in a hurry.  So I’m actively digging up some joy in order to remind myself that there is joy out there, and in here, and in me.

  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY!  – My son had his first sleepover at my mom’s house, which was a success.  And after I fell asleep on the couch at 9 pm and then moved upstairs to bed at midnight (after pumping and then freaking out briefly because I had almost forgotten to move the Elf – more on him in a second), I slept through until it was time to wake Birdy for school.  That’s a lot of sleep.  It helped make me feel like an adult human again.
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY! My insulin pump took a hard hit against the bathroom tile yesterday and didn’t get injured at all.  Same goes for my cell phone, which was accidentally thrown across the room in a separate moment.  Props to durable devices.    
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY! – Nothing says loving like a giant iced coffee.  Nothing.
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY! – My son has just realized that his hands are attached to him and that they are delicious.  He also figured out how to manipulate said hands in order to grab squishy blocks or to pat my face.  After several months of doing the route infant circuit, the smiling and grinning and playfulness of this little boy is exciting and adorable and makes me so happy.  He is the smiliest of all the Guy Smilies.  I love watching him explore and expand his world.
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY! – The Birdzone has also recently discovered the Elf on the Shelf, which means we have one in our house.  His name is Chippy.  I love him because she is so excited by his presence, but I kind of hate him, too.  Waking up at 1 am by inhaling all the oxygen in the room in a panicked “ohmygodthefuckingelfneedsmoving” moment is not optimal.  But her face when she sees where he’s moved to gives me intense happies.
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY! –  My neighborhood is awash with holiday decorations and people hanging out.  I love this stuff.  Mostly because we live among some really wonderful people, but also because of cookies and holy shit are there some delicious cookies going on.
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY!  Like these cookies.  Four ingredients, one of which is peanut butter so instant win.  I would live inside of a tin of these cookies, no problem.
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY!  – Also, in terms of recipes that bring joy, check out these penguins.  I want to make a waddle of these little fellas and set them loose in the neighborhood.  (Note:  It feels so right that a group of penguins is also called a waddle.)
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY!  Also, the cats are no longer experiencing feline PTSD (yes) as a result of the little Guy joining the family.  Siah’s hair isn’t falling out anymore and Loopy has stopped pawing relentlessly at the bedroom door.  (And now that they are back to being their normal cat selves, their nocturnal routines have returned in full.  Which means that Siah’s chubby ass going down the stairs happily at 3 am sounds like the heavy boot steps of someone who has broken into my house.  Cat burglar?)
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY! – Exercising is also still going forward, albeit a little tangled up with my family’s constantly-shifting work schedule.  And that’s a plus, since I was feeling very sluggish and lazy these last few months.  Related:  The West Wing is a good show.  Currently a few episodes into the first season and am getting way into it.
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY! – Also, I started using the Verio Flex (switched from my beloved Verio Sync) and that’s been a good experience, too.  The meter has less of an MS-DOS feeling than the Sync, and I’ve returned to uploading my meter results to the Reveal app.  Granted, I’m still not checking my blood sugar as frequently as I’d like to be (aiming for six times a day, still only clocking in around 3 – 4 times per day … but am wearing my Dexcom religiously, so that’s a plus), but the meter itself is a good upgrade from the Sync.
  • HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY! – And one thing that’s been consistently bringing good feelings to the forefront has been the diabetes community.  Seriously.  Every time I manage to log on and check out what people have been writing, it’s confirmation that people are in this to help one another.  From new voices in the DOC (like Today with Tubes and the posts on DOColors) to a whole list of benefits to life with diabetes (thanks, Catherine!) to policy efforts and #insulin4all and organizations aiming to improve lives for PWD, this community is still a huge source of good in my world.  I’ve always valued this space, but lately it’s been a bright spot in these times of crappy headlines.

Man, that felt good to list.  Channeling Ren and Stimpy entirely now.