I was thinking about diabetes privacy this morning while I was poking through the archives, and came upon this post from Diabetes Blog Week last year.  (Here’s a full list of the contributions generated by that prompt.)

What do you share about your diabetes? And what is on your List of Absolutely NOT Sharing, diabetes-wise?  For me, I don’t share my A1Cs with any regularity. Because as thick as my skin is in some respects, it’s admittedly very thin in others.

But hell yes I’ll post a photo of a 24 hour no-hitter on my CGM graph, because I’m proud of that accomplishment and I want to document it for my own sake.  Sometimes I feel a little creepy about posting a photo like that because it does not illustrate a true “day in the diabetes life,” but it’s nice to freeze frame a moment that I feel proud of instead of looking at a graph of Ms and Ws and throwing up my hands* in frustration.

Diabetes doesn’t always play nice, and I don’t always have a calm head.  Sometimes I go full Veruca Salt-rage when the effort into diabetes management doesn’t produce a stable flat line but instead reduces my glucose meter to what feels like a random number generator.

Diabetes goals feel really personal to me.  Back in 2009, when I shared that my A1C wasn’t under 6.5% when I conceived my daughter, I received criticism for not having my numbers under “good control.”  What gets lost in translation is the why of some decisions, like I was aiming for a slightly higher A1C earned without a pile of debilitating low blood sugar events.  My medical team and I had reasons for making specific decisions, ones that I don’t feel the need to constantly have to defend.

So I remain quiet about a lot of diabetes specifics.  I’ll share what medications I’m taking and what devices I’m wearing, but where my high alarm is set at on my Dexcom receiver might not be publicly shared.  I have my A1C taken regularly, but I don’t post a running tally of it anywhere.  The specifics of my data – blood sugar or blood pressure or weight or CGM values – do not define me as a person and do not dictate my ability as an advocate.

But seeing diabetes in context, the real juggling act that takes place to take a crack at making proper sense of this disease, is what I appreciate most about our community.

To revisit a thought from years ago:  “diabetes isn’t a perfect math where you can just solve for X.  Usually, we’re solving for ‘why.‘ And part of that equation is acknowledging, and appreciating, the sum of our community and what we document, every day.”

 

 

* this phrase has always grossed me out – “throwing up my hands” – because it’s hard not to picture someone throwing up their hands, vomit-style.  

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