When I’m feeling particularly moody, I check the average on my machine to assess how things are going, diabetes-wise.  Sometimes I’m expecting a nice number and I’m rewarded with an average of 120 mg/dl or similar.  Sometimes I look at the meter screen through my fingers and see an average of 180 mg/dl screaming back at me.

But until recently, I believed everything my meter told me.  It was my own little Oracle (like from The Neverending Story, which I have mentioned before and I still love).  Clean my hands, prick my finger, and act in response to the number revealed.

Earlier this week, my meter was more Magic 8 ball than Oracle.This thing reminds me of that show, A Current Affair.

Using my OneTouch Ultra2 (the mini-meter is officially my “beach meter” and sits waiting in my backpack, along with the tampons), I tested on Wednesday afternoon to see how much glucose I was carrying.

At 2:38, my meter blipped back with 121 mg/dl.  Ah.  Nice result there.

I am currently testing out the Keynote from Agamatrix, so I busted out that meter for a comparison test.

259 mg/dl.

Quite a difference there.

Remembering the Hand Lotion Incident from this past winter, I trotted off to the bathroom to wash my hands.  Returning, I retested with the One Touch.

2:40 pm:  244 mg/dl

2:41 pm:  118 mg/dl

Control solultion test at 2:42 pm:  115 mg/dl

2:43 pm:  210 mg/dl

2:45 pm:  Ask Again Later.  (Damn you, Magic 8 Meter!)

I’m silently screaming in my head at this point.  HOW THE HELL DO I TREAT A BLOOD SUGAR THAT WON’T STAY STILL?

The Keynote responds differently.

2:40 pm:  259 mg/dl

2:41 pm:  272 mg/dl

2:41 pm:  216 mg/dl

Control Solution test at 2:42 pm:  111 mg/dl

2:43 pm:  298 mg/dl

I needed a tie-breaker.  Calling upon one of the diabetics on the dLife Production team, I asked if I could snake his meter for a minute.  Having bailed one another out of several diabetes-jams over the last year, he was more than happy to help me out.  His BD meter spit back a crispy 252 mg/dl.

Okay, obviously I am high.  But I’m not particularly symptomatic, so what if I rolled on with the initial result from the One Touch?  I would have spent the afternoon in the mid-200’s, all while thinking I was at a healthy 120 mg/dl.

I’m thankful that I was testing out the Keynote, otherwise I wouldn’t have had the inclination to test again and find out that the One Touch was tossing skewed results again.  But my faith is shaken in technology at the moment.  Diabetes control is a moving target as it is, but to factor in technological misfirings in addition to my own wayward tendencies?

OneTouch, you need to get your shit together.