Last Friday, I couldn’t believe my eyes.Credit to

10:34 am:  358 mg/dl

10:34 and a half am:  259 mg/dl

10:35 am:  189 mg/dl

(Fragile readers, cover your ears.)

What the fuck?!!

Between the highest and lowest results, I’m seeing a difference of 169 points.  To correct down from 358 mg/dl, I need 5.4u of Humalog.  To bring me down from 189 mg/dl, I need 1.7u.  That’s 3.7u difference.  That’s either remaining in the crispy 200 range or ending up a mushy puddle of hypoglycemia on my office floor.  How exactly am I supposed to keep my blood sugars in check when I can’t accurately check my blood sugars?

I have HAD IT with this meter.  I changed the batteries.  I recalibrated the machine.  I used control solution (which could have been a bit-outdated, but still came back within range).  I thought about chucking the meter against the concrete floors here at dLife and watching it smash into a million pieces.  I thought better of that last idea and instead wondered if running over it with my Jetta would be more satisfactory.

I was one pissed off diabetic.

Placed a call to my doctor.

“Hi, this is Kerri Morrone.  I need a prescription for a new meter.”  Realizing that I have a closet full of One Touch test strips at home and reluctant to dance for the insurance companies in hopes of them filling another prescription for 1800 different strips.  “Can she write me one for the One Touch Ultra 2?”

“No problem.  We’ll call it into your pharmacy now.”My fancy-schmancy new meter.

Upshot to my lunch break, when I hoof it over to CVS and pick up my new meter.  Cracking it open impatiently in the car, I whip out my old meter and do a test, aiming to compare the results of the new meter against my now-defunct meter.

Guess who only has two test strips for the rest of the afternoon and can’t waste strips on a test comparison?

Arghhh … diabetes frustrations aplenty to end out last week.  However, once I got home and compared the results of the two meters, they were almost exactly the same.  Was it just a fluke?  Just a chaotic chance event?  Something purely to piss me off and make me think I’m going out of my mind?

Either way, the weekend was busy, but excellent.  A swan boat ride in Boston, an evening chatting with my college roommates, and the most bad-ass Mother’s Day breakfast waitress in the history of mankind.

More on that tomorrow.  🙂