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Feed Me.

“I spent [insert slightly obscene amount of money] at the grocery store this afternoon … again,” I said as I put the grocery bags on the kitchen floor.

Chris looked over and assessed the content of the bags.  “It goes into our bodies.  This is what we should be spending our money on.”

Food is an important topic in our house, ranging from its complicated relationship with my diabetes, its influence and  role in my daughter’s health, and overall how society pushes a confusing food agendaFood is a reward.  Food is a punishment.  Food is confusing as fuck and I’d rather just view it as food.

But as much as I’d like to say that I follow all the “rules” and do right by my body at all times, I slip a lot.  Unhealthy food habits creep their way into my regimen almost unnoticed at times.  (Sneaky little bastards.)  For example, about a year ago, I actively tried to cut back on the amount of coffee I was drinking, but after a few months of half-decaf and picking water over iced coffee, I found myself reintroducing that second, and then third cup of caffeinated awesomeness.  (Because that’s a huge problem for me – coffee is awesome, and I like it very much.)  But despite how much I might want to snuggle up with a giant iced coffee, it’s bad news to consume so much of the stuff.  I need to scale back.

I also have a tendency to defer to things like prepackaged and pre-measured yogurt in order to take a crack at keeping blood sugars from going nuts.  If I need a snack, it’s easier to reach for something already carb-counted, but that’s not always the best plan because I’d much rather avoid pre-packaged, if I can.

I won’t even mention the gluten-free journey, because that’s been an exercise in dedication and frustration all unto itself.

Basically, I’ve worked hard to cut out some bad eating habits, and some of them are working their way back in.  This trend needs to be met with an “Oh hell no” because I work too hard at being healthy to derail efforts by something as daily as food.  I need to revisit food logging, even for just a few days, to realign my brain with my mouth and hands.

In the past, I used an app to log food choices, but this time, I have a sharpie marker, a piece of printer paper, and a firm resolve.  I need to see my choices in black-and-white (or, specifically, teal-and-white, as the teal sharpie marker is really lovely) so I can make better choices.  Otherwise, I’ll end up swimming in an endless pool of iced coffee and protein bars.

… which kind of sounds delicious, aside from the whole “protein bars looking like poop” thing.  I think I need to stop this post now, because it just derailed.

5 Comments Post a comment
  1. I just wanted to say way to go!
    I too get tired of the balancing act and decide to just eat like a normal person. News flash T1D is not normal. So then I have to work out the reasons why a better choice is just that a choice….
    Just for today I will eat right,strive for diabetic excellence…And perhaps if I succeed then tomorrow I might not have a desire to be what the world says is normal.

    Thanks for showing me. I am not alone.

    07/20/15; 2:06 pm
  2. I also went grocery shopping today and spent far more than I had anticipated on fresh produce. Even though I’d gone to the Farmers Market yesterday I had to draw the line at $5 a pound tomatoes, so that was something I bought today. Eating fresh and local isn’t cheap, but I think it’s the healthiest way to eat. For the past two years I’ve carefully kept a food diary in a notebook , along with a record of blood glucose readings, insulin taken and any extra activity. By writing it all down I’ve become very aware of everything I’ve chosen to put in my mouth and it allows me to accurately answer when I’m asked “what did you eat five weeks ago that made your blood sugar skyrocket?”
    I also know that I’m not going to continue with this diary for much longer. It can be a real pain to write it all down if I can’t do it at the moment. I’ve learned from it, so it’s not a wasted effort. Each day starts fresh with new challenges and choices.
    Kerri, thanks for sharing.

    07/20/15; 9:11 pm
  3. Trina #

    Food is a battleground. It is not f’ing easy. As a mom to a teen, dx since age 7, food is at the forefront of so many of our conversations. I wish it wasn’t.

    07/21/15; 1:15 am
  4. I am so with you on the coffee thing! I hate to admit to myself what ridiculous amounts of it I consume alme days…

    07/21/15; 8:01 am
  5. Nell #

    I live by MyFitnessPal app for logging foods, seeing carbs and other nutritional values, and exercise. It works on iPhone, sends data to that health app also. Have you tried it?

    07/21/15; 5:29 pm

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