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Twitter Rant.

The lows that have been creeping in lately need to stop.  They are inconvenient at best, completely debilitating at their worst and the in-between is a muddled mess of glucose tab dust and frustration.  Yesterday I had a diabetes technology fail coupled with a highly symptomatic hypoglycemic event that occurred simultaneously with a phone call to the Joslin Clinic … which sent me over to Twitter with an agenda of rage.

First, it was my Dexcom receiver that went berserk on me, telling me on both my Animas Vibe and my G4 receiver that my blood sugar was 202 mg/dL with double arrows down but after my feet weren’t responding to the “MOVE!” commands from my brain, I grabbed my meter to double-check. And saw a blood sugar of 43 mg/dL.

I immediately went for the glucose tabs and housed several of them. The low symptoms were intense – confusion, anger, tears, and a hand too shaky to hold the jar of tabs properly, so I held it with two hands, like those stock photos of baby panda bears drinking from a baby bottle.

Then the phone rang, and I answered it because: 1. When I’m low, I make bad decisions, and 2. It was the Joslin Clinic calling and I always answer their calls because Joslin.

Yes, my insurance company is requiring a c-peptide test to confirm my type 1 diabetes status in order to cover my new insurance pump.

The irony was not lost on me.

I felt like a crumb for ranting but sometimes I’m a crumb.

And then the anger/adrenaline surge subsided and I was in that “weak with post-hypo panic, stupid body, knew I’d be fine in a few minutes but what the fuck” sort of fallout.

Eventually, as it always does, my blood sugar came back up and my brain tuned back into things happening on the planet. My CGM/Vibe/meter were back in alignment, showing me in the 80’s and holding steady.

But I’m still waiting for Joslin to call me back. You know, to confirm the type 1 diabetes I’ve had for 28 years.

19 Comments Post a comment
  1. It must have been something in the air yesterday. I had the longest, most symptomatic and debilitating low I have had in a long time, right at bedtime. Almost as frustrating as during a phone call with Joslin. Then was up and down all night dealing with the rebound high and another rebound low. Hung over today and ready to give this disease to anyone who wants a ‘challenge’. I totally agree that diabetes is doable, until those times when it is not. Like today. Thanks for posting your rant. Misery loves company, and is strangely encouraged by it.

    01/22/15; 10:39 am
  2. Stephanie #

    OR Maybe SURPRISE, you’re cured! You never know. #hopespringseternal

    01/22/15; 11:40 am
  3. Lynn #

    Kerri – Thank you for your rant. You are not alone. When I get low, I get panicky. I don’t know your lows, but I can empathize. I had a pump failure today (omnipod) – no reason, just a normal Thursday. Enough to make a gal a little crazy.

    I agree with Colleen. It is doable, but sometimes … ugh. I try to imagine what it was like to deal with T1D 30 years ago, and then I’m more grateful for my (glitchy) diabetes gadgets.

    01/22/15; 12:04 pm
  4. Dee #

    Maybe there was something in the air yesterday because I got low for the first time while having to immediately deal with something in my new office. Or, you know, maybe not because let’s face it, lows happen. Either way, thank god my new assistant is awesome because confusion and irritability were rife. I’m up and front prosecuting now instead of hanging out in the background as a law clerk, so I dread the day I have to ask a judge for a recess so that I can get my sugar up. Probably not in the best interest of justice to try to prosecute in a hypo-fog. 🙂 I’ll survive and people here are kind and understanding (except for that one awful defense attorney…), so I’ll just keep setting my goal a little higher on court days and keep my fingers crossed.

    01/22/15; 12:26 pm
  5. Tim Steinert #

    Sometimes my urge to rant is destroyed by stupid questions. I’d just changed insurance– read actually HAD insurance finally– and was picking up my insulin at the pharmacy.

    The pharmacists asked me, “do you know how to take this (or have you taken this before)?”

    I almost passed out from laughter. Yes, I do know how to take it. Except when I don’t which is proved often enough by the roller coaster that is diabetes taking me for a ride. Here comes a big loop. Hold on!

    01/22/15; 2:41 pm
  6. Martha #

    “doable until it’s a fucking shitshow” really does sum up life with diabetes.

    01/22/15; 2:57 pm
  7. Nancy Stopper #

    Thanks for sharing posts like this about how low blood glucose feels. It helps me understand how my daughter is reacting when she’s low. She has often overtreated hers because her body keeps telling her to take sugar because it hasn’t taken effect yet.

    01/22/15; 7:03 pm
  8. Kylie #

    Brilliant, raw,gutsy, Thanks. I just went to a Dexcom education session for DEs. They didn’t mention glitches. I”m so grateful for T1 blogs. Keeps my job real xx

    01/22/15; 8:24 pm
  9. This made me breathless with laughing but in a very respectful way.

    01/22/15; 11:07 pm
  10. Yeah, you’re exactly right, it’s “doable until…” Your 26 years of medical records don’t count for the insurance company. Hope you don’t have to do this every time you change insurance. Hang in there Kerri!

    01/23/15; 12:08 am
  11. Kristine V. #

    Hi Kerri 🙂

    Totally get your frustration having to deal with a low while trying to do something so normal as talking to someone over the phone- and especially when the irony is just so hilarious 🙂 I love coming to your blog and read posts like these where you sum diabetes life up in such a brilliant way!

    Luckily technology evolves very quickly and will only become more and more reliable until suddenly we don’t have to monitor our own organ manually, but rather a cool, discrete high-tech pancreas does the job for us without any information needed from the user 🙂

    Hope you have a nice weekend and big hugs from Norway <3

    01/23/15; 1:54 am
  12. Yes, my insurance company is requiring a c-peptide test to confirm my type 1 diabetes status in order to cover my new insurance pump

    This needs to be fought by support groups and doctors and everyone. Everywhere. Of course I don’t mind having a test done. Actually, I’d probably prefer that over filling out a million forms. However, the sheer stupidity of it needs to be adressed. Preferrably worldwide (and yes, I do realize that there are probably areas where pumps aren’t even available, but it still needs to be done).

    And on a much lighter note… why on earth tweet while low? 🙂 That must be worse than answering the phone in a slightly slurred voice…

    01/23/15; 7:37 am
    • I actually do mind having the test done. Normally I don’t have problems with the insurance hoops and extra stuff we have to do at times, but this one really bugs me because it feels so redundant. It adds more waiting to the approval process because I’m still waiting for labwork orders, it requires another visit to another doctor’s office to confirm a diagnosis I’ve had for 28 years, and it’s simply annoying.

      And the Tweeting while low? 🙂 I realize it’s silly, but I was so frustrated and wanted to vent. So I did.

      01/23/15; 8:29 am
  13. So… will this C-Pep test be good for life, or will they require another test in four years when you try to get your NEXT insulin pump? Because, you know, people who outgrow diabetes still enjoy experiencing fingersticks and infusion sets and hypos — for nostalgia’s sake.

    01/24/15; 1:49 pm

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