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The Opposite of Like a Boss.

I wish we had one of these phones.  Or a rotary phone.  Or a rotismat, with a chicken roasting on it.  Yum.  My blood sugar was tanking after over-correcting a high that morning.  (Actually, tanking after correcting a high and adding in my breakfast bolus, only the actual breakfast ended up being delayed because it took 15 extra minutes to get Birdy and Chris out the door for school today and by the time I was waving good bye as they pulled out of the driveway, I was already trembling and my mind was racing about how many socks still needed to be paired up in the laundry basket.)

Back in the house, I tested and my blood sugar was 48 mg/dL.  I was already four glucose tabs into the morning and waiting (im)patiently for my blood sugar to rise, but the phone was ringing.  And it was a call I needed to take, from my PCP's office.  I didn't pause to weigh the options of "answering" and "not answering," because the low fog was so heavy that I just answered the phone as if I were opening the fridge door - absently, routinely, and forgetting that there was a purpose in doing it.

"Hello?"

"Hi, this is [oh, let's call her Patient Receptionist, because she didn't hang up on me], from Dr. Bowtie's office.  I wanted to follow up on our discussion from yesterday?"

"Yes, hi.  I was hoping it was you guys.  I only answered the phone because I thought it might be you.  I'm having a very low blood sugar right now, so if I'm not making the most sense, I'm sorry."

She didn't need to know a lick of this.  I could have just let it go to voicemail, but now the awkwardness was on, full-force, and I couldn't stop it.  There was a long, empty pause.

"Okay.  Um, that's ..." and she didn't even bother finishing because I was already giggling uncomfortably.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to miss your call but I probably shouldn't have answered.  How about you talk like this is voicemail and I'll listen really intently?"

She probably thought I was wasted.  I sounded drunk, but wasn't.  Just low. And housing glucose tabs like it was my job. 

"Right, okay, well ..." and Patient Receptionist filled me in on the details of some upcoming labwork.  This was information I needed, and that I had been waiting for, and I was trying to be an attentive adult and focus on her words.  But I was making an already really awkward situation worse by interrupting her and apologizing for interrupting her.

"I'm sorry. This is all good information.  Oh, I interrupted you - I'm sorry again."  Chomp, chomp on the glucose tabs while the Patient Receptionist must have been rolling her eyes, and rightfully so.

"It's okay.  So we're set to see you next week," she said.

I nodded.  And then, "Oh, I'm sorry.  I nodded, which you can't see since we're on the phone."  An ill-timed and unreasonable chuckled escaped my mouth.  "Hee hee - I might be a little low still but I'm sorry."

"Not a problem, Mrs. Sparling.  No need to be sorry.  We'll see you next week."  And she hung up, probably ready to relay the story to her coworkers of talking to a wicked drunk lady at 9 in the morning who claimed to be "low."

Oh how I wish I had chosen voicemail over answering.  Blood sugar now is 109 mg/dL and holding steady.  But the embarrassment level is a double-arrow straight up to my face.

Comments

Hilarious! I love this story. Thanks for the laugh this morning.

It could be worse. My BFF works at a wine store. One of their customers comes in every day at 9 AM, buys two bottles of Korbel, and then later calls the store drunk and accuses whoever has the misfortune to pick up the phone that they've poisoned her.

This story has absolutely nothing to do with diabetes, but I guess what I mean to say is that Dr. Bowtie's receptionist probably deals with loonies like the Korbel lady, and so she might be able to tell the difference between low sugar loopiness and damn-it's-only-9-AM-and-I-am-already-plastered.

(Admit it. You'll never be able to look at a bottle of Korbel again without thinking of this story.)

Ok...I loved this story!
Suddenly I realize that I am NOT the only one that feels this way when talking to normal people (non-PWDs) when my blood sugar is low.
The feeling that you have to interject "my blood sugar is low" into every sentence was one I thought only I felt.
I am truly happy to have found this site as it keeps me sane!
:)
Thank you Kerri

I'm happy that it's not just me that this happens to. (He types, as he devours a sandwich while attempting to fight off a late lunch low.)

Thanks for the laugh... can you hear me giggling? I know this scenario too well. Today, however, I'm higher than a kite, as in "discover electricity" high. That brings about problems of its own.

You don't need to be embarrassed. Obviously she knows your diabetic & if she doesn't know what a low sounds like by now then it is high time she learned. *giggles* BTW, I do the same. One day at work after rambling for about 10 minutes straight, I suddenly stood up & said "My blood sugar must be checked!" Then I promptly left the room. No clue why I phrased it that way or what I was thinking, but every one of my co-workers followed me out of the room & watched me take my BG. I'm not even kidding. I looked up to discover my audience about the time the result popped up. They leaned forward IN UNISON to see the result and I was lost in a fit of giggles for at least 15 minutes. In between giggles I announced that my BG was 51. I turned to grab my glucotabs & when I turned back around everyone was searching their pockets & purses for candy. It was the sweetest & most surreal thing ever. I also learned my co-workers have some good stuff stashed. I scored some Smarties, Skittles, AND M&M's on the deal. :D

I have developed a protocol for phone calls when my BG is very low. I will listen to caller id to determine who is calling. I only pick it up for my husband or daughter. Everything else goes to voice mail. I have to pick it up for my husband or daughter because if I don't, they worry that I am in trouble. So I will answer with "I'm low, I'll call you back in 15" Then I call them back when I am feeling better.

I get a little silly too when low. It is funny how the brain reacts to lows.
Christine

I don't usually giggle when my BG is low, but I can relate to saying all sorts of crazy and unnecessary things (and then recalling them perfectly after my BG has risen to a normal level.) Anyway, you likely gave this Patient Representative a better understanding of hypoglycemia and its effect on the brain!

Why choose to be embarrassed?? You were not rude or mean - which is me when I am low and someone is keeping me from my sugar.

It is a cute story about life with a malfunctioning pancreas. Choose to laugh and realize that this is just one of those things that comes with breathing.

I feel awkward communicating even when my sugars are in the normal range
Lows make me feel even more awkward
oh well, keeps life interesting =)

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