Won't You Be My Valentine?
Oh rotting, feeble pancreas of mine,
Won't you be my Valentine?
Won't you wake from your long sleep
And make some insulin, you creep?
What makes you sit, all shaped like a wiener,
Lazy and dull, with a pompous demeanor?
What makes it okay, that for your enjoyment
You've spent twenty plus years filing unemployment?
We need to start over; we need to be friends.
We need this whole type 1 diabetes to end.
I'm tired of shots and I'm sick of the lows,
So I think we should talk about ending this row.
I could use a break, my corn-cob-shaped friend.
I'd love to have 'old age' listed as my end.
I think that your time off has drawn to a close.
I'd like working islets, and plenty of those.
How 'bout it, old pal? Care to start working?
Care to start minding duties you've been shirking?
I promise to be an attentive best friend,
I'll thank you each morning and as the day ends.
I won't take for granted the hormone you make
And I'll forgive you for the last 24 years' mistake.
I've brought you some flowers and a Border's gift card,
In hopes that when I bring milkshakes to the yard
You'll be so inclined to jump start all those islets
Who've been holding their breath for so long that they're violet.
So what do you say, oh pancreas of mine?
Won't you be my Valentine?
Comments
I love it Kerri!! Thanks =)
Posted by: Brandy | February 14, 2011 08:46 AM
calling your pancreas a wiener will endear you to 10 year old boys everywhere. Prepare for the "wiener panc fan club"...
Posted by: Michelle | February 14, 2011 08:47 AM
LOVE this!
Posted by: Lindsay R | February 14, 2011 08:51 AM
this is great ! I'm going to pass it on to my son.
Posted by: stacey | February 14, 2011 08:56 AM
I giggled at the wiener line. Whenever I've made an artistic rendition, I think any sensible person would agree it looks like a penis. Where I go from that is far too inappropriate to post here, so I'll just wish you and your, ahem, organ, a blissful Valentine's Day.
Posted by: Lee Ann Thill | February 14, 2011 09:14 AM
Thanks - needed a laugh today
Posted by: val | February 14, 2011 09:19 AM
This is exactly how I feel today after jumping from 72 to 340 mg/dl on such a "lovely day". Thanks! : )
Posted by: Astrid | February 14, 2011 09:21 AM
Standing ovation! :D
Posted by: Kim | February 14, 2011 09:27 AM
LOVE this!!!
Posted by: Anonymous | February 14, 2011 09:41 AM
Keri, this is a great poem. Hope you and your family have a great Valentine's day.
Posted by: Judi | February 14, 2011 10:03 AM
Hahahahaha! This was a good giggle....thanks! And happy Valentine's Day!
Posted by: Caroline | February 14, 2011 10:15 AM
Fantastic!
Posted by: Ralph | February 14, 2011 10:21 AM
Oh, wow, this is by FAR my favorite Valentine's plea ever... I hope all of us get that instead of chocolate this year! Here's to hoping & wishing...
Posted by: Hanna | February 14, 2011 10:46 AM
I find this funny and sad at the same time. Hopefully they'll find a cure for this nasty disease soon.
Posted by: Paul Hobson | February 14, 2011 10:55 AM
Thanks Kerri! I needed a laugh today and you brought joy to my face =)Silly lazy pancreas!
Posted by: Megann | February 14, 2011 10:59 AM
when I bring milkshakes to the yard ... LOL!
Posted by: Alison | February 14, 2011 11:05 AM
Creativity like that is priceless. Good work on your composition!
Posted by: Roselady | February 14, 2011 11:31 AM
LOVE IT!!!
Happy Valentines Day :)
Posted by: Lora | February 14, 2011 12:22 PM
Love it! Thanks for the laugh!
Posted by: Misty | February 14, 2011 12:27 PM
Where, when and how do you come up with this stuff?!?!! Love it!!!
Posted by: Meghan | February 14, 2011 12:58 PM
You rock. Happy
Posted by: sarah | February 14, 2011 01:20 PM
That's GREAT!
Posted by: Angela | February 14, 2011 01:33 PM
Love this, love you, love your pancreas - and mine 2!!
Posted by: k2 | February 14, 2011 01:45 PM
Posted by: Jaimie | February 14, 2011 03:59 PM
Great poem...Blake is still laughing at the 'wiener' part.
Posted by: Shannon | February 14, 2011 04:01 PM
ROFL! You said "Wiener."
HAHAHAhahahahaHAhAHAHAHAHA
I actually laughed out loud at the line and my whole office asked what was so funny.
I just said, "weiner."
Posted by: SuperG | February 14, 2011 05:16 PM
Weiner? Really, Kerri? Weiner?
"This has been Really?! with Sara and Bes" (get it, like SNL?)
Posted by: Sara | February 14, 2011 06:16 PM
Love this post and the blog in general.
Posted by: Ross | February 14, 2011 08:58 PM
I lOVE your mad poetic skills! And I totally cracked up at the wiener line! Thanks for the chuckle! And I'm so hoping that your pancreas agrees to come off unemployment and get back to work!!!
Posted by: Anonymous | February 14, 2011 09:53 PM
Thanks for making me smile today!!!
Posted by: Cody Bartholomew | February 14, 2011 09:55 PM
You are the best poet ever!!! I'm totally sharing this. :)
And if your pancreas takes the hint, can you have it talk to mine?
Posted by: PrincessLadyBug | February 14, 2011 10:22 PM
"I'd love to have 'old age' listed as my end." Amen to that:)
Posted by: Huda | February 14, 2011 10:50 PM
This is the best diabetic valentine's day post ever!!! Thanks.
Posted by: Bethany | February 15, 2011 12:09 AM
How do I hate thee, Pancreas?
Let me count the ways . . . .
Posted by: Suki | February 15, 2011 06:18 AM
Love this! you are so talented
Posted by: stacy | February 15, 2011 09:53 AM
Fantastic poem! Thanks for making light of an all-too serious affliction.
Next year you can write an ode to your (dead) beta cells, since in fact the rest of our pancreases supposedly works just as it should!
Posted by: June S. | February 15, 2011 10:08 AM
You are a gifted writer!
Posted by: JuicyMama | February 16, 2011 10:12 AM
I liked corn cob shaped friend better than wiener, but the whole thing was hilarious. Made my day!
Posted by: Justjenny | February 16, 2011 03:19 PM