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Disco.

Over the holidays, my husband and I had the opportunity to join his agent (who happened to be in town) for dinner.  Grown-up time, sans BSparl.  (I wore tights.  It was a fancier than our average Tuesday night.)

So we all sat down to dinner and while everyone was talking, I reached into my purse to do a quick blood sugar check and to remote bolus for the bread and olive oil that had been placed on the table.  My hands stirred up the contents of my purse, but didn't score the meter.  

"Damn, I know exactly where it is," I mumbled to myself, picturing my meter case on the front seat of our car, which was down the street and tucked into a parking lot.  

Conveniently, I had this scrappy little One Touch Mini rolling around in my purse, so I was able to test, but I was out of luck in the remote bolusing department.  And with my pump tucked discreetly, but snuggly, into the front of my bra (clip against my sternum, buttons on the pump facing out), it wasn't exactly the most readily available medical device.  Not without some seriously awkward self-groping, that is.

Chris was watching me scramble.  "Just pull your napkin up and grab your pump.  No one will notice," he whispered.

"You don't think I should excuse myself to the ladies' room?"

"Nah, go for it."

So while everyone was talking, I reached down the front of my dress and deftly grabbed my insulin pump.  I programmed in the bolus and then went to tuck it back into my outfit without anyone noticing.

Except.

Once you've begun a bolus on the Animas pump, if you press a button while that bolus is administering, it prompts the pump to cancel the bolus.  It's a great safety feature for when you realize, mid-bolus, that you absolutely do NOT want to take five units of Humalog to cover a spinach salad.  But it's not so awesome when you accidentally hit a button while securing the pump to the front of your bra, and it suddenly starts singing a loud song.  And lighting up, providing a strange glow from your chest, not unlike a medicinal disco ball.

"What's that?"  One of our dinner companions asked, looking in my direction but not knowing the noise was coming from my body.

"Sounds like a cell phone!" One of the other dinner guests said, smiling and reaching for another piece of bread.

During the brief distraction, I snagged the pump again and programmed the bolus a second time, then stuck the pump back where it came from without issue.   Disco boobs.  There.  I said it.

"Oh, it's me.  No big deal - all set now.  So as we were saying ..."  I felt the bolus going in, and the pump was quiet again.  No need for me to get into a big explanation of "Oh, this is my INSULIN PUMP and I'm DIABETIC and YES I CAN EAT THE BREAD."  It wasn't what I wanted to talk about that night.  I just wanted to move on, and swiftly.

No one asked any questions, and the night went on to be a very nice one, with excellent food and great company.

And Chris and I definitely laughed our faces off when we got in the car to go home. 

"So do you think your agent and his family think I have some kind of musical ... disco boobs?"

Comments

I know that I've been there before, so my mortified feelings came back while reading this, until of course you mention disco boobs. Then I went into a fit of laughter :)

Omg this happened to me so many times, lol! As long as we keep our sense of humor about it's fine! I used to show waiters and waitresses the pump all the time and explain what it was because they would see a little light between my breasts and look concerned lol

:) Disco boobs. he, he, he. (I have the mental capacity of a 12 yr old boy sometimes!).

But dear, don't you ALWAYS have disco boobs? ;)

It's a shame this dinner didn't happen on a Saturday night...fever.

(I understand if that comment has put me in 'Blog Comment Timeout' for a while)

Disco boobs! I pull my pump out of my bra/dresses all the time. It's funny that it's pretty rare for anyone to inquire what I'm doing. :)

Love that feature about my Ping too...
Why do I suddenly have Donna Summer, the Village People and KC & the Sunshine Band going through my head? lol Great, I can see the rest of the day it's going to be nothing but Y. M. C. A. na na na na na na na.......

Oh Kerri - you crack me up as usual - I needed a good laugh this morning. I've never thought of what we do with our pump making us have disco boobs (have Dancing Fool going thru' my head as I type this out). I wish I could have upgraded to the Ping just for the remote - alas - too expensive to upgrade - so if we ever meet up - I'll be the lone Disco Boob Queen - but it's okay - I think some of us D's are exhibitionists at heart - right?
Off to freak out the cats with some music while I work away .... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qXnojmQz3I

Sounds the the Unibeam coming from Iron Man's chest.

"Disco Boobs." Not to be confused with the "Smurf Boobs" or that occur from using the blue stuff on a bad sunburn lol.

I alternate between the disco boobs and wearing a pair of Spanx and clipping the pump to one of the legs.

Which begs the question: Which is worse? Reaching my arm down the front of my dress or up the bottom of it?

Senior Prom... Minimed Paradigm pump with little mini remote for boluses, pump set on vibrate so I wouldn't be too loud, strapless dress with pump front and center... dinner at prom... vibrating boobs and a VERY confused date... GOOD TIMES!!

This made me picture you as a well-dressed Iron Man! Your posts always make me giggle!

Love this! Happens to me all the time. Mike calls me "Fembot." :)

This is so funny! Something similar happened to me when I graduated from college. When I shook the president's hand, I'm pretty sure he was staring at my "disco boobs"!

ha ha. This made me laugh so much. I usually excuse myself to the ladies room, but one time I didn't and everyone was staring at me awkwardly, because I must have been less discreet than you. I just looked around and said, "what?" and started eating again.

haha-that is great! I wear mine there all of the time-thank you God for not making me an A cup! There would be no hiding it up there.

OK, "Disco Boobs" is now stuck in my head and it's all your fault!

HA HA HA HA!!!! That's so funny :) Seriously...I can just imagine the singing and flashing coming from under your dress!!!

A day in the life, I guess!

So I did something similar at a four star newuork restaurant. I had one of this nifty leg bags for your pump that hide it well but dont stay in place so well. While the waiter showed me to the restroom, the whole thing fell out from under my dress and bounced off his shoe. I'm sure he's still to this day wondering exactly what I was packing under my dress.....

Man! I miss all the fun being all hips and no boobs!

At least you didn't get the glare of death from the older man sitting in the pew in front of you during the Christmas eve service when your DexCom starts blaring (while being stuffed in the bra!). Thankfully, Mom leaned over to the person sitting next to her and loudly said "Thankfully, Emily can't silence the machine that tells her if her blood sugar is too low and she needs to eat." We hope he got the message...

Haha great! its always awkward explaining diabetes and how you actually can eat anything you want, even the bread, and even harder when your pump goes into song and dance!

Just got my Ping "installed" today! I have to go to my fiance's holiday party Feb 4th, so I'm hoping to be creative with storing the pump in formal attire-thank you for sharing your stories and suggestions!

Hilarious story for me, as I have a 19yr old daughter who is a pumper and have seen similar situations. Plus I am also a film sales agent...anyhow good writing. FYI we are also preparing a documentary on teen diabetes here is a trailer http://idcommunications.org/sweet-16-a-documentary

I always keep my pump in my bra...I have gotten to the point that I don't give a poop if anyone sees me pull a device out of my bra. I tend to make a joke about it to brush it off. Like, "It's my superwoman light on my chest!" LOL! I figure, at least I am not picking my nose at the dinner table or something!

Since the Ping's music can be programmed you might like to change from the standard 'Fleur de Lise' that normally plays to 'Staying Alive'.

How in the heck did I miss this...found it from Lora (My Diabetic Child)...I have images of the the lights flashing and the music-y alarm blaring from your chest...what a sight!

Once after bolusing I was standing in a crowd of people one person pointed at the glow through my dress and said "your like Iron Man!"

I really liked that one

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