I was at my father's house this past weekend and ended up poking around in some old photo albums, and these snapshots from decades past made me smile. This is a before-diabetes photo. I'm probably about three in this photo, and I also appear to love butterfly cakes:
This photo was taken two months after I was diagnosed with diabetes. I'm at my first post-diagnosis birthday party (my friend Jill, the birthday girl, is on my right), and that box of sugar-free peanut butter cups were my answer to birthday cake. It's weird to look at that photo and see how big my mother's responsibility was, because I was so small.
(Also, if you look closely, you can see Kitty crammed into the crook of my arm. I brought that thing everywhere, and she still currently lives in my closet. I waved to her this morning.)
But out of all the photos I found, this one of me at Jill's birthday is one of the very few that brings any memory of diabetes. I remember my mother coming to dinner at the party and giving me my shot, then coming back again before bed to test me and give me another shot, and then waking me up in the early morning hours as she returned to test and shoot me up again first thing in the morning.
I have a clear memory of my mother and Jill's mother in the kitchen that morning, as we all toddled downstairs after our sleepover, and they were drinking tea. It didn't dawn on me until later that my mother probably didn't sleep much that night, running back and forth between our house and Jill's house to monitor my diabetes. I had barely been diabetic for two months, yet my mom made SURE that my childhood wasn't compromised, even when her life was.
My mom is my greatest diabetes asset. She worked hard to make sure that my life was still mine. And now that I'm an adult and on the cusp of my own motherhood, I am deeply appreciative of everything she has done for me.
Even now, when I need an ear, I call my mom.
Who else you gonna call?
(Sigh. The sad thing is, there are more pictures of me in costume than anything else. And barely any of those costumed moments fell on Halloween. Like this one. And this pirate one. I am a proud product of my environment.)