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dTOEs: Second Edition

Diabetes comes with its own set of jargon, that's for sure.  From "carbage" to "zombied," we've got the latest diabetes sniglets here on Six Until Me.  Submitted by readers who are living with diabetes (and some from me), these entries made me laugh out loud!  I present, for your reading and laughing pleasure, Diabetes Terms of Endearment:  Second Edition!

Diabetes Terms of Endearment:  Second Edition

 

 

3 am Break
For couples where one partner has diabetes, this refers to 3 am low blood sugars, wherein one person drinks juice and the other goes to pee.

Beedies (see also "Diabetus")
Expression used to refer to diabetes, usually spoken in the voice of an old man. ex. "I gots the BEEDIES!"

Bloodletting
Not using perfectly good blood from a cut from a knife or other household item for a glucose test because you recently tested. 

Blood Suckers
Collective term for test strips, blood drawing devices, and vampire cannulas.

Carbage
Term indicative of the collective carbohydrate content in an item, rhymes with "garbage."  ex.  "What's the carbage on that bagel?"

CCB
Crazy correction bolus.  See also "SWAG" or "Rage Bolus"

Cheap Date
Also known as "diabetics," as we don't normally order dessert on dates. 

Cramming
The act of over-eating to treat those pesky midnight low blood sugars.  See also "Sleep-Eating" or "Panic Eating"

Creepy Fingers
A term Jillian's sister uses for what over pricked fingers look like after a long swim in the summer, all pruney and holey and mangled.

CSI Dream
The blood stains on sheets and clothing from glucose tests.

Cured
Word often muttered under your breath when you end up low after precision-bolusing for a meal, as though your body didn't need the insulin.  ex. "I have no idea how I ended up low.  I must be cured."

Diabetes Medicine
What Shannon calls juice boxes so that her other kids don't clamor for one while she's treating her son's low blood sugar.  See also "It's Her Medicine."

Diabetes Sheriff
Any non-diabetic who feels it is their job to give their opinion on what we should eat.  Classic ex. "You can't eat this - you have diabetes."  Note that it's never a question - always an imperative statement.

Diabetus
Wilford Brimley's preferred pronunciation of the word "diabetes."  Usually followed by laughter and the viewing of YouTube clips. ex. "Hi.  Are you using Liberty Medical to get your diabetus medications?"

Diablandic
Sugar-free or diabetes marketed food that tastes horribly bland (ex: - Girl Scout Sugar-Free Brownies)

Dial in
The act of taking a bolus with an insulin pump. ex. "Dial in for that panini." Note: this expression does not make sense, as there is no dial on an insulin pump, but that reasoning makes me like it even more.

Dead Bees
Term given to diabetes by the classmate of a small child.  ex. "He needs juice because he has dead bees."

Droopy
Terri-Lynn's son's term for feeling low.  Also known as jiggly, fuzzy, d-fogged, and lost.

"Get The Machine!"
Can be said to anyone who is already familiar with your diabetes and has done something to make their finger bleed out a drop, i.e. a papercut, sewing needle prick, small scale kitchen knife or razor incident, etc.

Glucose Goblins
The fiendish critters that make our blood sugars high after an insulin set change.  ex. "I changed my site, didn't eat anything, and still ended up at 250 mg/dl.  Damn glucose goblins."

Gusher
After pulling out a needle or infusion set, blood spurts out all over the dang place. 

"Give Mommy the Finger."
A phrase often used by parents of children with diabetes, referring to a parent's request to test their child's blood sugar.  Often met by amused stares from strangers.

Flat Line
A welcome sight for people using CGMs. Refers to rock stable, flat, normal, wonderful blood sugars over a prolonged period (3 or 9 hr screens on the D7). Especially gratifying after pizza, chinese or bagels.

Flicked
Or "to flick" - When an infusion set is nudged or grazed by a doorknob, child's foot, random cat paw, etc.

Hangover
The resulting headache after recovering from a low or high blood sugar

Hans n' Franz
To change one's infusion set, to get "pumped up."

"Have You Checked Your Checkins?"
Phrase used by Seonaid's father, which means "Have you checked your sugar?"  Editor's Note:  It made me laugh out loud, so I wanted to make sure it made it to the list.  ;)

Insulate
The act of taking insulin.  ex. "Have you insulated yet - it's almost dinner time."

Insulint
The act of exhibiting a bad attitude, while also being diabetic.

"It's Her Medicine."
A phrase used by a friend once, when her date wanted to eat the emergency crackers I had in my purse.  "Can I have a cracker, Kerri?"  Before I could answer, friend leaned in with a knowing look and said, "No, it's not a cracker.  It's her medicine." 

Leash
Pump tubing.  ex. "I walked by the doorknob and it grabbed me by the leash."

Multiple Choice
When you don't even need to use a lancet to test because you can simply squeeze your fingertip and have blood come out of several previous lancings.

Non-Carbonated
Foods that do not have any carbohydrates.  Also known as "free foods."  ex.  Jell-O, pickles, air.

"Not A Toy"
Phrase used to explain to a young child why they can't grab your insulin pump or testing meter and run off with it.  ex.  "No, Abby, that's not a toy."

Old School Shot
Reverting back to injecting insulin via syringe after becoming used to bolusing with an insulin pump.  May also be known as "rockin' it old school" or "shootin' old school."

"Oh Donuts"
Phrase used by Michelle and her son as the preferred curse word to utter after seeing a high blood sugar reading.  Origin:  Started after they consumed donuts and her son said "oh donuts mumma."  She responded "Exactly."

Pepper Jolly
From the jump rope rhyme "HiLo PepperJolly."  In diabetes terms, "pepperjolly" refers to being in your glucose target range.  Note:  Origin credited to Fairlight.

Red Gold
After pricking your finger, blood comes out in geyser-like spurts instead of forming a droplet.

Shooting Up
The act of taking an insulin injection. This expression is most often noticed in public by uneducated bystanders who look over and raise an eyebrow. (see also "I'm high.")

Sleep-Drinking
The ability to consume juice while still actually asleep. 

Sugar Boogers
Little gummy candies that Lea's son Noah eats when low

Sugar Shy
Not telling anyone that you're diabetic

Sweaters
The furry, sticky feeling your teeth may get when your blood sugar is high.  ex. "I was almost 400 mg/dl, and I definitely had sweaters on my teeth."

Vampire Cannula
An insulin pump plastic cannula that has sucked up blood and refuses to push out the appropriate insulin dose.   

YDMV
"Your diabetes may vary."  Phrase used as a caveat after explaining how something affects your diabetes.  ex.  "Pizza makes my blood sugar spike, but ydmv."

Zombied
Fingers that are too cold to get any blood out of them.  Most easily remedied by sucking on them or rubbing them against your clothes to get the blood flowing.

Comments

I laughed til it hurt and then some! I'm posting a link to this on my "moms" support site. We laugh about lots of things over there!

Kerri, thanks for posting this. I needed a good laugh today.

I see that some of my terms made it to the Terms of Endearment, including Cheap Date (both my wife and are type 1s) and Diablandic (Girl Scout sugar-free brownies made me actually wish for the return of carob brownies).

Here are some more that I suggested (I'm NoVaType1). Now I have to add a few more...

DTF: Diabetes Vernacular

These are great. I'm a loser for not contributing. Count me in for the 3rd edition.

Ahhh I made the list! This was really entertaining.

My favorite has to be Cheap Date. Thank you Mike! ha ha

I laugh even when I have seen the singlet before.

Love this Kerri! Well done and thank you So much for doing it!

Great list! http://www.diabeetis.com/ (had to mention it)

Thanks for taking my suggestion! These were terrific. :)

I've only used "shooting up" in the past but I can relate to nearly every single one of these. Great list!

Thanks Kerri

Perfect list for a rainy Monday.

funny, funny, fuuny. Thanks Kerri

Sorry ya'll have it wrong it is pronounced DiabetUS!!!! EVERYONE said it that way in the 90s anyway. 'your way' sounds sooooooo weird to me. If your way was correct it would be spelled diabeties!!!

Dictionary.com says both are correct:

di·a·be·tes Audio Help /ˌdaɪəˈbitɪs, -tiz/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[dahy-uh-bee-tis, -teez]

Yay!
I am so glad Dial It In made the list. I will have to forward it on to my mom - the originator! :)

Gosh it feels good to laugh at diabetes doesn't it!

Funny!!! Thanks for the laugh :-)

LOVE it, Kerri!

So upset that I forgot to contribute "sleep noshing". Along with sleep drinking, the act of feeding your kid PB and graham cracker sandwiches without them waking up!

Oh, and "strip tease" the act of never having quite enough blood to test.

this was hilaarious, I showed my dad that his quote made the list and he really enjoyed it!

Hi Kerri,

Read this and laughed like crazy. Only D people can get away with being high in the park.

Love this list! The "beedies" and "dead bees" were particularly cute. ;)

Here's a new one for you: "Insulin Assasain". Its the act of killing insulin. So far I have two kills - one heat related and one slow death via x-ray. My wife has one for dropping a vial on the kitchen floor.

We're going to start putting stickers on the fridge and see how long it takes to become an ace!

I am a nanny and really enjoy this one: Don't push Briley's buttons.

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