I Don't Want To Talk About It.
For the past three days, I have had a flickery little floater spot in my right eye. It dances out of the way when I try to focus on it directly, but I know it's there.
Yesterday, as I was walking into the gym, I saw these beautiful and terrifying explosions in my left eye, bursting just out of my line of focus and causing my heart to sink into my stomach. They passed after a few seconds, but I thought about them before I went to bed last night, and remembered them against first thing this morning.
This morning, when I called my retiniologist and described my symptoms and my voice broke just a small bit, they cleared an appointment for me today at three-thirty.
It could be nothing. I could be over-reacting. It could just be eye strain or exhaustion or any number of stressors. It could be one of those things that causes people without diabetes to rub their eyes, shake their head, and think, "Wow, that was weird."
But I know there's already something that's been noticed. And for me, with more than twenty years of type 1 in my past, it's something I can't ignore.