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Feeling the Burn.

I’m in a slump, I can admit it.

Blood sugars have been dodgy, to say the least.  My machine average is up to 143 mg/dl and considering the lows that have been peppering the last 10 days or so, I’m running higher than usual on the average.  I’m experiencing some strange moments that are testing my patience.

Like this morning:  I tested at 123 mg/dl at 8:30 am, had a cup of coffee, bolused 2.2 units to cover my delicious Yoplait Light yogurt – should be all set, right?  I even waited before I ate!  Nevertheless, a taunting 291 mg/dl just winked at me from my meter.  How the hell did that happen?  I changed my site late last night, but I woke up at 103 mg/dl and didn’t have the pump off for more than 30 minutes while showering/getting ready.  How exactly did this happen?

Is it stress?  That wily little bugger.  I’m feeling very busy lately, with project deadlines spanning across my job and my freelance opportunities, but not so busy that I thought it would affect my blood sugars.  But then again, I did just receive a whopping medical insurance bill from my previous job (they are billing me now for 2005?) that sent me into a mental tailspin.  And I’m a little tense about the flight on Thursday.  It could be stress.

I’m in a mini diabetes-burnout moment.  I’m avoiding A1c tests (as I mentioned the other day and as is the topic of this month’s Generation D.)  Granted, I am testing.  I’m eating relatively healthily.  And I’m at the gym, even though my heart isn’t into it lately.  I’m very much looking forward to this vacation because my brain needs a little break from the churn-and-burn that’s been going on of late. 

Ah, St. John.

Ah, that helped.

I.  Can't.  Wait.

Ooh, so did that.

I'm hopeful that white sand beaches lower A1cs.

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Comments

Did you know that white sand beaches are created from clown fish poop? They chew up the coral, poop it out, and voila! white sand beaches :) I learned that on our vacation.

We're having a bear of a time dealing with Brendon's numbers. One night he's a 155 (nice!) the next night, he's a 45 (no rhyme or reason). He's been flip flopping like that at various times so that we can't change rates. We just treat as we go along. Diabetes...that slippery little thing.

Those surprises suck Kerri, no two ways about it.

Do what you need to do in order to get through it, then enjoy your vacation and don't worry about a thing!

And Shannon - I REALLY had to resist the urge to say something about Kerri enjoying her time with her toes in the clown fish poop. I'll never look at those white sandy beaches the same...

They're made from what??!!

Pffft. I'm going to smoosh my toes around in that sun-warmed clown poop, then. :)

Did you have to rub it in that it's my last college spring break and I'm neither (a) on the beach nor (b) doing anything fun at all but (c) working on papers, papers, papers and graduate school applications.

Ah...well. Those beach pictures helped me a bit too ;)

Sometimes we just need a break. And that doesn’t mean we are noncompliant or bad diabetics. It just means we need a break and that is totally okay.

You deserve a holiday. If you end up on beaches like those, I will be pleased for you, whilst at the same time resenting you wholeheartedly. Jealousy is a terrible thing.

If those white beaches don't bring down your bs numbers and A1C, I don't know what can! lol.

I wonder if one could get insurance reimbursement for that?
beaches=less stress=lower a1c...
Clown fish poop nonwithstanding, enjoy yourself.

I am dragging today myself - blood sugars are okay, but I think I am developing an allergy to the adhesive on my infusion sets. Drag. Just thinking about what that might entail has me grouchy. But it helps to read about others having a mini-burnout, it really does. Reminds me it's a marathon, not a sprint. Way to hang in there.

Kerry, I don't know the laws in RI, but in Washington, where I live, an insurance company or health care provider cannot bill you for services rendered over a year ago. If they didn't bill you initially, you might be off the hook there! Not that I've had to fight that battle or anything... ;-)

This may end up being a duplicate post - sorry if it does. I seem to have lost one to cyberspace.

Kerry, in Washington, where I live, insurance companies and health care providers cannot bill for services that were rendered over a year ago. So if they didn't bill you initially, you may be off the hook for that bill. Something to think about.

I can relate to the mini-burnout. My sugars are pretty even right now - knock wood - but I think I am developing an allergy to the adhesive on my infusion sets. Just thinking about what that might entail has me REALLY grouchy. :-(

Hi Kerri,

I just came across your blog a week ago and it inspired me to start one of my own. I put a link to yours from mine... http://bittersweet-surrender.blogspot.com

Hang in there - it'll even out soon.

Take care,
Lori

Kerri,
You are real. I like that about you. I have been a diabetic since the age of 4 (22 years this June). I love the fact that you discuss things that no one seems to understand or want to discuss. Love, stress, jobs, and everything else that can effect diabetes (or be effected by it). My blood sugars for the past few weeks have been the up and down deal like yours. And stress is the reason for it. So until I know the stress is gone (After April when I am no longer working full time, AND taking 6 hours of doctoral classes at a college that's an hour from my home!) I am just doing the best I can. I just want to thank you for being real and honest and sharing with us the frustrations that we don't often share with others. Thanks.

I am sure a little vacay will get that a1c right where you want it. Take it easy Kerri.

Ummm, if white sand beaches are made by clown fish poop...what made my beach of boulders ?? HA!

Have fun frolicking in the white, sandy clown fish poop. May it lower your a1C and relax your spirits. And may you not get clown fish poop where the sun don't shine.

Hi Kerri,

Love your blog. I ran across it when I began blogging, but haven't visited in awhile. Thanks for your comments.

My sister lives in Hawaii and if plane tickets weren't $700 I would be there lowering my A1C right now! Those pictures are killing me and all those fruity rum drinks (Piña Colada a real fave) and coconut syrup over powedered sugar dusted French Toast--Maybe I should stick to the Ahi Poke and Lomi Lomi.

Everyone deserves a diabetic break. Chill out, you'll be fine. Your numbers will probalby improve with less worry and guilt. Motivation will return or I bet you'll have a slew of diabetic bloggers on your a**.

Jana reminded me of the months earlier this year when sugars were just bonkers... Grad School Applications! Now my current reason is preparation for my graduation recital....
This summer, I'm making it my mission to learn how to better deal with stress, if not making better life choices to avoid it, Anyone else with me?

I feel the stress too....semester is winding down in grad school which basically means I have 27 million assignments/tests/projects due between my 4 classes. On top of trying to send out resumes, prepare myselt for my clinical nutrition rotations this summer, and of course trying to balance my diabetes. My To Do list has about 25 things on it....that just isn't right!
Have a great trip Kerri!

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