Take that, Squirrel!
Things were starting to look a little fuzzy. I was having some trouble, seeing blurry bits, and a pounding in my brain that was matched only by the sounds of people’s heels on the industrial flooring here at dLife.
In particular, it was my right eye that was bothering me.
The panic was on a slow boil, starting with those little questions that would creep in between meetings and editing.
“Kerri, did you test? Maybe you should test and make sure you’re not popping out of range.”
I comply with the voices in my head. Quick finger prick reveals a spot on sugar of 104 mg/dl. (Which was always the sugar they splashed out on meter commercials. B.B. King was always 104 mg/dl. Recently, I’ve seen commercial results of 99 mg/dl. Damnit! They do so love to challenge us.)
“Kerri, maybe you’re stressed out. Are you stressed out?”
I assess the situation: Nothing too stressful kicking around. Feeling calm, for once.
Except for the nagging suspicion that something else is going on with my eye.
After talking with Chris about it, (Kerri: There’s something in my eye. Chris: Go have it checked. Kerri: Seriously, there’s something going on. I’m concerned. Chris: Go have it checked? Kerri: I should have it checked.) I made an appointment with my retinologist.
Dr. Retina popped in the drops and I sat in the waiting room with Chris while my eyes dilated.
“I can’t see a thing,” I said, almost comforted by the fact that it was absolutely normal under these circumstances to be half-blind.
He took my hand.
Dr. Retina came out and summoned me. “Kerri? Right this way.” I settled into the big beige chair in the last room on the right.
“So, let’s see … you’re three months early for your follow up. Something going on?”
“Actually, yeah. I’m seeing some spots and blurry bits sometimes. It doesn’t appear to be only when I’m high or something like that. And my blood pressure is fine – I just had it checked. But I’m concerned that the hemorrhage you found in September has progressed.”
“You, nervous?” He chucked me a grin as he slipped on his Hannibal Lector-style miner’s cap to examine my eyes. “You seem cool as a cucumber.”
“You have to be kidding me,” I leaned back in the reclined chair. “I’m a nervous wreck about everything.”
He gave me a stern look. “I know. I was being sarcastic. You need to relax a bit.”
He blinded me with those intense white light bars, then the miner’s cap. He blinded me with the machine you lean into and settle your chin and forehead against the bar. Every few minutes, we had to take a break because my eyes were tearing up due to the intensity of the light. The technology of an eye exam, up close and personal. All things considered, he blinded me with science. (You had to see that one coming, right?)
He flipped up his mask.
“I can’t even mark that box.”
“What?” I couldn’t see a damn thing. I rubbed my eyes with the back of my wrist in efforts to acclimate to the normal lighting.
“The box that indicates retina damage. What you have going on in there is so small, I can barely see it. That’s why this exam was so long, because it took me a while to actually find the hemorrhage this time. There’s no bleeding into your eye. I can barely tell you have diabetes, never mind two decades of it.”
I grinned.
“We’ll slate you for follow up in May. We’ll keep close watch on that little … what did you call it?”
“The squirrel. An eye squirrel.”
He washed his hands at the white sink in the corner of the room.
“The squirrel. I’m thinking he’s not the cause of your eye strain at work. Do you spend a lot of time on the computer?”
My inner-blogger cringed.
“Yes.”
“And do you take a lot of breaks?”
“Not really.”
“Okay. I’m recommending that you get a diffuser for your computer screen. And maybe you want to go over to my buddy at LensCrafters and look into diffuser glasses to wear while you’re doing computer work to reduce eye strain. And relax, would you?” He patted me on the arm.
I stumbled as gracefully as I could back out to the waiting room.
“How did it go?” Chris stood up as I walked over.
“Good. Everything is good. No change. He couldn’t even check the box.”
Take that, Squirrel.
Comments
Oh, man.My heart stopped for the 2.5 minutes it took to read this.. I'm so happy you got GOOD news on the retina front! Kickin' diabetes (***) all the way. I hope those tips help for stopping the blurring spells- I think they're called ocular migraines?Whatever they are,they can sure punch the worry button.
Posted by: type1emt | January 11, 2007 11:45 AM
Thank gawd it was nothing serious.
Well, at least you can rest easy about your eye health!
Posted by: Shannon | January 11, 2007 12:37 PM
Kerri, awesome news!
I have to admit to laughing out loud when you told of Dr. Retina revealing he sarcasm to you. :)
Good luck with the diffusers!
Posted by: Johnboy | January 11, 2007 12:49 PM
he=his
Posted by: Johnboy | January 11, 2007 12:50 PM
Glad to hear the eye exam went well.
You didn't mention it, but do you ever ask the eye doc to wipe the chin rest? Some of them have little papers on the rest and others don't. I've gotten anal about either ripping off a new piece of paper for myself or wiping it down with a Kleenex. I mean, we control whatever we can, right?
Posted by: Lyrehca | January 11, 2007 12:52 PM
This is awesome, excellent news!
Paranoia gets ahold of us sometimes I think; evidenced by the fact that I've been to the eye doctor 8 times in the past year. Yes. 8 times. Thinking something was going on. There is nothing going on. I'm going to have to look into this diffusing thing.
Posted by: Nicolep | January 11, 2007 01:45 PM
Type1Emt, Shannon, JB - Thanks! I'm glad it wasn't any crummy news, too. :)
Lyrehca - Actually, he gave me a tissue to blot my eyes after he put the drops in. So I used it to wipe off the chin rest thing later in the exam. I recycle!
N - Paranoia is making me nuts. (Veiled squirrel reference there.) I keep forgetting that I'm not only diabetic, but getting older, and that I may possibly need glasses Just Because. Or that I spend my day with my face glued to a computer monitor. It's nice to know everything is status quo, though.
Posted by: Kerri. | January 11, 2007 02:02 PM
I am so glad you spanked that squirell! :)
The Thomas Dolby reference was awesome BTW.
Posted by: George | January 11, 2007 02:19 PM
Thank goodness Kerri all is ok.
I was holding my breathe as I was reading.
I am glad that it was determined to be eye strain and not something bigger.
Posted by: flmgodog | January 11, 2007 02:52 PM
Glad you're OK! And as someone who's been through a "traumatically detached retina", I can tell you it's no picnic. (Soccer ball straight to the eye. I'm the cool kid with sports goggles now!) However, I can also assure you that it's fixable. I don't know the specifics of diabetic retinal detachment, but in my case at least, I had a week of pure hell where I had to lie on my stomach or keep my head down so the air bubble would hold my retina in place while it reattached. All this and a scelaral buckle too! (I have no idea what that is or how to spell it. I get squeamish reading about eyes...) ANYWAY, the point I was trying to make before I started rambling, is that after all was said and done, I have 20/20 vision again (with contacts, but as you know I had those before). One downside to the soccer ball incident was that it also gave me a traumatic cataract and so the lens of my eye had to be removed. This was the only thing that now makes my vision any worse than it was before - I'm 20/20 at eye chart distance, but since that is my only focal point, things are blurry in that eye up close. It's always amusing at the optometrist being nearsighted (-4.25) in one eye and way farsighted (+6) in the other. "Which is better... 1 or 2?" "In which eye?!?!"
Heh.. they actually had to call the "leading retina guy on the east coast" do to my surgery cuz it was so f-ed up. My mommy always said I was special.
And so, while I may not be diabetic, I at least know where you're coming from with the eye troubles. Apparently there's always a chance my retina could re-detach, but I'm not sure there's anything I can actually do about it. I just gotta keep going to the retina guys every year...
Remember, floaters and flashes of light are bad!
Posted by: Krista | January 11, 2007 03:20 PM
Fabulous news! And the squirrel--for such a surly guy, he is cute. (or maybe I'm just looking at the Reeses?)
Posted by: Nic | January 11, 2007 05:06 PM
Kerri,
I'm so glad everything is OK. I was skipping over parts to get to where you said what the results were.
Posted by: Penny | January 11, 2007 06:19 PM
*mom hat on* See? You shouldn't have sat so close to that screen, now your eyes are squiqqly and you're squinting and you're gonna need glasses. You should have listened to your mother. Kids. They never pay attention to you.... *mom hat off*
:D
Glad to hear it was nothing major.
Posted by: julia | January 11, 2007 09:48 PM
Good heavens Miss Sakamoto -you're beautiful! Great, now I've got Thomas Dolby stuck in my head. Glad the eye exam went well.
Posted by: Carey | January 12, 2007 08:50 AM
Oh for pity's sake - I too was a wreck reading this. I hate it when they send you back to the waiting room for the dilation to take place, but, I also hate sitting in the exam room. Torture. Just another day in the life.........
Posted by: Minnesota Nice | January 12, 2007 09:20 AM
Who knew blogging was bad for your health!?!?
I'm SO glad everything is ok - WHEW. You had me worried for a bit there.
Damn squirrels - always getting into trouble ...
Posted by: Jamie | January 12, 2007 11:20 AM
I hate squirrels. Flying rats. Go Kerri!
Posted by: artsweet | January 12, 2007 11:38 PM
Thank. God.
This is wonderful, Kerri, really wonderful.
Posted by: Sandra Miller | January 13, 2007 08:25 PM
i just stumbled across this blog randomly [looking for some diabetes info] and i am speechless [though fortunately not writeless]...this post was so powerful and moving to me.
i can't get over it.
and i feel so relieved by your positive outcome...congrats!
Posted by: Ann | January 14, 2007 12:42 AM
Funny how I have to read about these things in your blog. ;-) Maybe if you got movie stations on your cable and watched more TV and less computer....hee hee!
Posted by: Monica | January 16, 2007 12:25 AM