Crosby, Stills, and Gnashed Teeth
I put the key in the ignition and the car growled to life (as only a VW can), filling my car with the opening bars of “Well there’s Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Blitzen …” What a holiday way to start the day – escorted to work by Mr. Bing Crosby himself.
Despite the fact that it’s been freakishly warm, (Global warming – do we really need more evidence than 50 degree weather in the middle of December?) it is beginning to look a lot like Christmas. White lights have popped up all over the streets of my little town and the shops downstairs from my office are playing host to wreaths and bright red bows. It’s a pretty little scene.
As I listened to Rudolph and sang along as loudly as I could during my commute to work, I interjected the “Like a lightbulb!” and “Like Monopoly!” parts into the song, as I learned when I was a little kid. Do kids still do that? Does my six year old nephew know all these silly parts to the Rudolph song? Do your kids know them?
I came across this article from News Target last week, about Santa Claus being diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. Strange read, indeed. According to the article, Santa asserts that "I want to beat my diabetes and get my weight under control without popping pills … And it's just too risky to take insulin injections when my reindeer tote my sleigh across the sky."
Moving to something less Christmassy but just as mis-informed, I also found this podcast via Julia’s blog: This nutcase Mickelson is spouting o
ff about the “genetic flaw of diabetes” and asks “Why would somebody with an obvious genetic flaw chose to reproduce?” I listened to the podcast twice and almost completely lost my mind. I have made efforts to articulate a response to this pinhead who actually goes so far as to quote a book from the turn of the century about eugenics, which states that someone with genetic flaws shouldn’t have children. He goes on to assert that we, as a society, don’t practice that anymore. And then he has the nerve to drop his voice and ask “Why not?” He doesn’t want his taxes to fund the treatment of diabetics. He says that those who “can’t pay, can’t play.” He says a lot of things that made me furious.
If you can stomach listening to this whole podcast, I applaud you. I had to take several breaks due to my intolerance for his Nazi-esque viewpoints. Listen for yourself here. And then listen to James Hirsch set him straight here. Despite the attempted apology from Mickelson, he’s still an ignorant fool and should be deeply shamed.
I need to go listen to Rudolph again.
Comments
Santa has Type 2...who thinks of this stuff?
Mickelson is an ignorant ass. No argument to dispute that fact. His apology is hollow.
Posted by: Shannon | December 13, 2006 10:40 AM
Wow. I know I won’t be listening to that podcast. It will only offend me, and I’m sure this person isn’t important enough to me to ever warrant feelings like that.
Posted by: Sarah | December 13, 2006 10:46 AM
Shannon - Santa was "diagnosed" a few weeks ago. Terrific. So now the mongrel media is ruining Christmas for kids by making Santa "real enough" to end up with a disease. I mean, the guy has flying reindeer. Can't they just let us magically assume his body is immune to all afflictions? This is as bad as that rumor that went around that Ernie from Sesame Street was hit by a bus. Do you remember that one?
Sarah - The guy is a shithead. I can't think of a better response than that.
Posted by: Kerri. | December 13, 2006 10:51 AM
That guy is clearly full of sh*t. I listened and fumed... And then listened and fumed some more through his "apology" show.
Posted by: nicolep | December 13, 2006 11:12 AM
Clearly diabetics should not be allowed to reproduce. Think of the harm they do to society! As soon as I'm elected to the Senate in the Republican takeover of 2012, I plan on introducing a bill requiring all diabetic men over the age of 13 to wear penile clamps, and women between the ages of 12 and 55 shall have National Guardsmen posted as sentries at the entrances to their vaginas.
Jesus.
(Also, Dan Savage gets credit for the National Guard remark, but I couldn't resist stealing it myself.)
What's next? Let's drown all the children with low IQs! Let's not allow miscegenation! That got us really far...
Posted by: Bobby Mengele | December 13, 2006 11:20 AM
LMAO...Ernie was hit by a bus!! Poor guy.
Posted by: Shannon | December 13, 2006 11:20 AM
I could not listen to the podcast. I read his "apology" and it was enough to send my bp up 10 or 100 points. I figured the podcast would kill me, and then wouldn't that mean he won? Oh, wait, NO I've already passed on my "diseased" genes to an offspring!
Should we also not procreate because I'm fat? because I have acne? Because my husband has poor vision?
Stupidity should be a valid reason and he should've stepped to the front of that line!!
How about Ernie having cancer? That one blew me for a loop.
Posted by: Sarah | December 13, 2006 12:41 PM
Ok, there were all kinds of comments on that podcast putting that guy straight. And that asshat deleted them all.
Posted by: Megan | December 13, 2006 01:40 PM
Ha!! Asshat - Megan, that is one of my most favorite insults of all time. You are a champion. ;)
I saw some of those comments before the aforementioned AH deleted them. They were scathing. I loved each and every one of them.
Posted by: Kerri. | December 13, 2006 02:01 PM
I can't listen to it - I know it'll send my blood pressure through the roof. If he's against diabetics procreating, he must be against anyone with anything "different" about them from procreating. Apparently his mother doesn't share the same views, as she gave birth to a dumb ass herself. I wonder if he has any kids???
BAH!
Posted by: Jamie | December 13, 2006 02:23 PM
Ernie had cancer too??!! What that poor puppet has been through....
Posted by: Shannon | December 13, 2006 02:24 PM
Shannon - Check out this link. It's the urban legend o' Ernie's demise.
Posted by: Kerri. | December 13, 2006 02:30 PM
Wasn't there a rumor that Kermit got Miss Piggy pregnant?
Those Muppets know how to stir up the gossip.
Posted by: Shannon | December 13, 2006 03:23 PM
Only you would know that one, Shannon. ;p
Posted by: Kerri. | December 13, 2006 03:35 PM
Kerri,
Not only will your nephew be raised to see the value of all human life (a concept foreign to assholes like Mickelson) he will also know every optional lyric to the Rudolph song!
Posted by: LeeAnn | December 13, 2006 06:47 PM
ahhh, the days of "like a lightbulb!" and "like monopoly!"
my niece still believes in Santa this year (will be 9 in March). I don't want her hearing about the type 2 diagnosis. She (and her brother) are fascinated with Uncle Greg's supplies, that's for sure. We've tried to educate them about type 1, at least.
Posted by: Rachel | December 13, 2006 10:38 PM
I listened to the beginning of Mickelson's original rant....I almost lost it and had to turn it off. It was posted on the CWD mailing list that he does indeed have teenage children, and he is truly an asshat in real life. (I love that term - I think I need to adopt it!) I haven't heard Hirsch's response...I was hoping he would rip that moron a new one. How interesting that he deleted all the comments he didn't like.....
And let me assure you, I am doing my part to make sure that all the kindergartners in my school do know "like the Toothpaste" and all the other extra parts to Rudolph. It's not the same song without them. :)
Posted by: Beth | December 13, 2006 10:40 PM
I won't be listening to that podcast thank you very much. See, I had a Doctor tell me that very same thing right after he finished verifying that I was truly T1D so that the great State of Texas would pay for my college tuition (one of the few good things about being a PWD). Even though I was young I recognized defication when I heard it. I'm even better now, I can recognize it without being in the same room with it.
Posted by: Keith | December 13, 2006 11:15 PM
Sorry, that was supposed to be 'defecation'... I got so riled I can't even spell correctly!
Posted by: Keith | December 13, 2006 11:20 PM
Maybe someone should find this guy's genetic flaw and STERILIZE HIM (or at least install a mute button).
Posted by: Johnboy | December 15, 2006 07:39 AM
Yeah, that debate pissed me off (http://noncompliant.blogspot.com/2006/07/ten-reasons-why-i-despise-should.html). Can't bring myself to listen to the podcast, I'm too busy being a mom to two amazing boys :)
Posted by: Kassie | December 15, 2006 09:31 AM
Kerri,
I loved the poem about being low "the night before work"
As far as funding for diabetes and the upseting article, remind them of how we fund drug users by furnishing them with clean syringes so they don't get sick?? I'm from Chicago where there is such a program.
Posted by: Debby | January 12, 2007 09:20 PM