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The Flu Shot Emmy Award

They had a flu shot clinic at dLife yesterday.  This happens in most offices around this time of year.  The nurse comes in, you submit your form, and she sticks a needle in your arm.  Easy-peasy. 

Not for me-sie.

I can’t stand needles.  Irony, anyone?  The diabetic who hates needles?  That’s me.  Better said:  I fear any needle I’m not in control of.  After administering my own injections for over seventeen years and using an insulin pump for the last two and a half, I am very accustomed to doing my own shots.  When I was a little girl at the pediatrician’s office, my doctor would let me put my hand on his wrist as he administered the shot because he knew I needed some semblance of control over the needle.  If I’m just sitting and waiting for that needle to slide into my skin … oooh, I can’t stand the thought of it.  Having my blood drawn at Joslin is a nightmare and the lab technicians remember me as, “Hey, you’re that girl we had to sit on to draw blood when you were a kid!”  Now I just turn a ghastly shade of pale.

So yesterday, the nurse came to give flu shots.  And, knowing my mother panics if I don’t have this shot every year, I stood in line and waited amongst my co-workers. 

My heart started to race a small bit from the anxiety of the needle-to-come. 

“You okay?”  Marketing Guy asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine.  I just hate needles.”

“Okay.”

IT Guy who busts on me daily leaned in.  “You hate needles?”

“I fully recognize the irony.  But I hate any needle I’m not controlling.” 

The shots were being given in the conference room, which is behind plate glass walls. I could see every syringe that the nurse drew up.  I started to get a little jittery.

“You really don’t like this, do you?”  Marketing Guy asked.

“Not really, but it will be okay.”  The Senior Editor walked to have her shot.  I couldn’t control myself.  “Good luck!”  I called after her.

My turn.  Nerves shot.  (No pun intended.)  I walked towards the glass doors with as much confidence as my shaky knees could muster.

“Good luck!”  Giggles from the line behind me.

The nurse examined my form.  I fidgeted beside her. 

“Little nervous?” she asked with a smile. “It won’t hurt a bit.”

“I know.  But I’m still anxious.  I’m diabetic, too, so it’s bizarre to be afraid of needles.”

“Makes sense to me.  Good thing you’re getting a shot.  You’re in the high-risk group.”  She opened a plastic sleeve and removed a sterilized syringe.  I looked back over my shoulder.  The group waved at me.

“They’re busting on me for being nervous.”  I grinned at her. 

“Looks like you should pretend to pass out afterwards.”  She grinned back and uncapped the needle.

“Here we go, quick pinch … you’re fine.  But they don’t need to know that.  Go ahead and slump over to the side.”  She pulled the needle away from my arm.  I let my head roll to the side and collapse onto my arm on the long conference table.

“Are the looking?”  I whispered.The Flu Shot Emmy

“Yeah.  They look sort of concerned.”

I popped back up, put my cardigan back on, and shook the nurse’s hand.

“Thanks for playing.” 

She laughed.  “Anytime.”

I walked back towards the line and tossed out a grin.  A co-worker grabbed one of the many Telly awards that dLife has won.  “Here’s your Emmy, Kerri.” 

I’d like to thank the academy ... and the patience of the wonderful nurse ...

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Comments

Awesome story! LOL!


Hey Kerri: My daughter is the same way about blood draws and flu shots! I never considered the control aspect but that makes so much sense. I can be more sensitive, now. Thanks.

Bob's gonna love this story...

Krista - Yeah, Bob loves needles, doesn't he? :)

I hate needles that I'm not in control with. I've passed out lots while having my blood taken. It's weird.

I never get a flu shot.

Don't feel bad Kerri... I actually pass out when getting my blood drawn or having someone else give me shot, unless I'm lying down that is. So, instead of getting my flu shot at work today with everyone else, I'll have mine next week at my endo appointment, where I can lay down and not pass out!

The irony is amazing!!

Yet another:

"I AM NOT ALONE" moment brought to me, courtesy of Kerri's blog.

I have been mocked my whole life for my fear of needles wielded by other people.

Now THAT would be a performance worth seeing. Just sorry I wasn't in the line with you. ;-)

Oh I wish I was there to witness the joke. I especially thought it was funny the way the nurse instructed you to slump over.

Good funny post :)

Kerri- That was great! I am with your mom on this one, so glad you got the flu shot and see it even gave you a chance to show off yet another talent. lol Have a great day.
Viv

O is the same way. She was a drama queen when she got her flu shot this year.

LauraMotion - Thanks, kiddo.

Vicki, Kelsey, A-S, and Viv, and Johnboy - I'm glad I'm not the only one who freaks out about needles. It seems like a strange phobia, considering. ;)

Shannon - The nurse was awesome. I would definitely start an improv act with her.

Julia - O is a fellow drama queen? I'm glad I'm not alone in that one.

Carol - Welcome back, ALM! Glad to have you.

I can't stand watching other people get shots. I'm alright when it's me, but seeing it happen to someone else? geh!

tek

Everyone in my office gets Flu shots so i figure, i have nothing to worry about. LOL

I feel you about shots. I once went to the doctor and asked his nurse if i could give myself a shot instead and she let me.

Dear Kerri and Krista,

Thank you for posting about my One Great Fear, and thank you for rubbing it in while I'm home suffering with the flu.

Love,

Bob

Lol great post! I can totally relate! I don't mind needles but when it comes to someone else giving me a shot, my heart feels like it's going to come out of my chest.

This year I got my flu shot at the grocery store down the Halloween candy aisle..amusing indeed lol.

Ok that is so freaking funny and i can totally relate to your anxiety you have about needles.

That's funny stuff right there man!!! What a cool nurse!!

The thing that gets me about the flu shot, is it goes into your MUSCLE! Ew!

It just feels so different than an insulin injection.

I also chuckled at George's comment! I like that guy!

Thanks for sharing the story. Unfortunately, my flu shot which I got on Monday seems to have escalated my head cold. At least I got to giggle while I feel gross. :)

Kerri--
I love it (your "passing out", not your fear of needles)! Needles don't bother me...but blood that isn't my own makes me light headed everytime. I can't watch all those surgery shows on tv b/c I get all woozy at the first sight of blood.
--Deanna

I love this! Great job Kerri :-)

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