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A Mother's Perspective: Cameo #2

It's a book.  Seriously.

Note from Kerri:  Here's my mom with another cameo post, writing from the wilds of RI (where I used to live).   

  "Hello again!

Kerri has asked me to write another cameo for her blog.I must admit that I am one of the “lurkers” as some people identify themselves. I often come to Kerri’s blog and after reading her enlightening entries, I surf on down the list. My attention is always captured by the great posts that I read. I often wonder if I would have handled her diabetes care differently if there was a support system such as the “OC” when she was growing up. To have this group of people to bounce ideas off of is wonderful. But since I didn’t have such a support group, it was up to the medical team and her family. I think we did really well but still I wonder if maybe I wouldn’t have been so paranoid and rigid at times.

I feel like an absolute “nut” when I think of some of the things I did in the name of making sure she stayed healthy. I could be down right devious. With two other children in the house who could and did want to eat sugary foods, I had to devise ways of disguising these treats from Kerri. Yes, I actually took to emptying frozen green bean boxes and stuffing ice cream and candy in them. It was a brilliant idea, or so I thought. Kids have noses that sniff out such stuff. It didn’t take her long to figure out the “green bean box deception”.  I would even submit this poor child to random breath smelling. If I smelled chocolate...the way I carried on, you would think the world was ending. My point is that I sure could have used a support group to reach out to and put things into perspective. Of course I learned to lighten up as we traveled down this road of diabetes care, but it was bumpy at times. I was so afraid of something happening to her that I sometimes over-reacted.

Many of the anxious moments she never knew about then. When she got her driver’s license I learned to sleep with “one ear open”. I could never be totally asleep until I knew she was safe and sound in bed. All the times she wanted to sleep late on weekends…I would go to her room and just by touching her hand she would automatically stick her finger out for the fingerprick, never really waking up.

I think one of the things I despised most was being a “nag”. I couldn’t leave anything to chance. Always asking “Did you test?” “Did you eat?” “Did you shoot?” “Are you low?” Couldn’t help it. Well, I probably am still a tad bit of a “nag” as old habits die hard. I still can’t resist asking the questions even now if she is visiting.

After all the doubts, nagging, watching and yes, sometimes Green Bean Trickery, I am assured that all did turn out well after all. When I look at her I see a pretty, witty, compassionate, confident, funny, strong young woman.  (sidenote from Kerri:  Ma, you forgot “neurotic.”  That one is key.)  The journey wasn’t always easy but she has all the tools to deal with this disease and she also has the gift of knowing all of you."

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Comments

Thanks for your insights Kerri's mom!

Since I got diabetes when I was 13, my mom didn't have a lot of direct involvement in my care. My parents (and myself) wanted me to retain my independence with the development of this disease. It wasn't until I was older that I learned of my mom's heartache at watching me deal with my disease: waking up and listening as I got up in the middle of the night to correct a low; checking my meter to see what my blood sugars were running and calling my doctor in a panic when they weren't what they were supposed to be. I now know she felt a bit helpless, wanting me to feel empowered in my self-care though worried that I wasn't doing well enough!

You may have been strict, but that's what a mother does, especially since Kerri has had diabetes from such a young age. She's blessed to have a mom that cares so much and is her advocate in this battle against diabetes.

Thank you Kerri's Mom,
You have done such a wonderful job, you turned out an awesome product.=)
We really appreciate your words of wisdom and I for one love knowing that the "nagging" will pay off.

I loved reading this. As I was only diagnosed recently and don't live close to home, my mom is not involved in my diabetes at all. They visited when I was admitted to hospital, and when I carried on with my life, and they were home, I would get a bit irritated with my mom when she asked me "what is your level?", "what are you having for lunch?" etc. I think in some ways this was more of a reminder to me that my life had changed. I guess not having grown up with it, and living with it as a child has made it a bit different for me. And in smoe ways I thought that this disease was mine, and I had to deal with it by myself. But now I can see that all mothers worry (I know she does and that she cares and loves me a lot...). I guess it was just different for me...

Thanks Kerri's mom for a wonderful post!

I don't think parents could ever achieve the perfect balance of managing diabetes without over or under doing things. I would much rather over do things.

There was an article in the magazine JDRF puts out about elderly people who have lived healthy lives with Type 1 for more than 50 years (plus or minus). Guess what....they're parents did things the same way you did.

You've paved a healthy road for your daughter :)

Thank you I can not help but think of my mom every time I read your posting.. I wonder if she had tricks hmm I gotta call her... I will have her read this as always ..

I always feel so much better when I read posts from mothers. Since my 5 year old granddaughter was diagnosed on 5-8-06 I have scoured the internet for sources of information and more than just that - inspiration!
I somehow found my way to your daughter's website (divine intervention for sure!)within the first week of Kylee's diagnosis and after reading Kerri's Six Until Me story I felt so much hope. Hope that Kylee would grow up healthy, happy and most of all a "whole" person.
I sent Six Until Me on to my son and d-in-law, my husband and all our friends - wanting them to know that there was hope...that the sorrow we were all feeling now - would pass - that Kylee had her life to live - That this diabetes would not stand in her way of being a kid first -
I was stunned when Kerri actually took the time out of her busy life to drop me a note of encouragement. She is a treasure!
We are so blessed by your daughter's stories and now your stories too - please continue to share your heart with us - if you only knew the soothing calm that it brings to the mothers and grandmothers hearts - thank you.

I love reading posts by "Kerri's Mom". Of course, I love reading Kerri's as well :D

I think you've done a wonderful job with your daughter - as I've said before, I can only hope to raise my 2 year old (Type 1) to be just as confident with her D care as Kerri is. Parenting is a rough road as it is - but throw Type 1 in the mix and that road gets pretty bumpy. It is nice to come to the O.C. and get support as we all go through these stages with our children. We all have the same goal in mind ... the goal that you have achieved with Kerri.

Congrats on doing a wonderful job!

We should all be lucky enough to have a Mom like Kerris! I happen to know she is, to this day, a devoted, involved, and loving Mother and Grandmother. All her children are living proof that Moms make a big difference in life. She has a lucky family.

Ah ... "JulieShroo" ... you've just outed yourself as my wonderful sister-in-law: married to my older brother, mother of my nephew and currently pregnant with my niece!!!

I'll leave you to your nom de plume, though. ;)

Thank you Kerri's mom! We all think you did great!

Thank you for the insights, Kerri's mom!!

Like Kerri, Riley can be sound asleep, but when we enter his room at night, sonetimes he just automatically sticks out his little finger.

It seems like you did a fine job with Kerri.

I have had type I diabetes for 60 years and have no serious complications. My Dr. thinks I am some kind of "freak". This just does not happen!!
My wife watches me just like you watched Kerri. Same questions, every day, just like the ones you asked her. I get tired of that but I love her for it! Thanks for your story!!....Al

Hi Kerri's mom. My 19 year old daughter was diagnosed a few months ago. Kerri has been so sweet and supportive to me, and has even offered your services! I think you must have been just right as "diabetes mom", because your daughter is wonderful--healthy, proactive, full of life, and sensible. Surely you had something to do with that!

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