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MacGyver Morrone.

Little black dressIt was short.  It was low cut.  It was ever-so slightly slinky.

It was the opening gala for the Newport Film Festival and the dress code was "a little bit dressy."

Seriously, when can you go wrong with a little black dress?  It always looks classy and simple and suitable for almost every occasion.  I had a beautiful one from Ann Taylor in the closet.  Just grab a pair of black heels, some sparkly (fake) jewelry, and slip into that dress.  No problem.

... No problem until I went to slip into my Something Most Comfortable: namely, my pump. 

Most often, I don't have problems wearing a dress and the pump at the same time.  Usually I tuck the pump safely between my ... in my bra and that's the end of it.  Or I utilize the thigh thingie that straps around my leg and has a little sleeve for the pump. 

This dress, however, was too low cut to hide my pump discreetly in my bra and the damn thigh holster wasn't cutting it.  (I think the velcro in that foolish thing is clogged up and is un-velcro-y now.  Damn it.) 

I debated forging forward with the bra attempt and started planning answers:  "Yes, it's very nice to meet you.  I loved your film.  Um, yes.  I was born half robot but I usually don't speak of that to strangers," or "I'm actually taping this conversation with my boobs," or "I, too, enjoy injecting hormones.  Seriously.  I'm hooked."

I couldn't do that.  Besides, the little peeking loop of tubing clashed with my necklace.

I tried to set the pump in the waistband of my underwear, but that proved to be both nearly impossible and completely visible under the form fitting bodice of the dress. 

Damn it, damn it.

I had no long acting insulin at the house.  I didn't want to disconnect and be forced to test and piggy-back boluses all night long.  I wanted to wear the pump and get on with it.

The Solution?:  I rigged up a little contraption using the clip on straps to a convertible bra (thank you, Oh Secrets of Victoria), the case from the thigh holster, and the tiniest piece of duct tape.

The pump stayed put.  The film party patrons were none the wiser.

And MacGyver's got nothing on me.


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Hi- I've been a lurker on your blog for a while now and just wanted to thank you for writing such great stuff, which has, finally, motivated me to blog as well... As for McGyver... I never saw an episode, but based on that new commercial, your title seems more than appropriate- again, thanks.

Bike shorts, Kerri. They do the trick every time.

Great idea. I never wear anything without pockets anymore because of the Where to Put the Pump dilemma. The thigh thingie never works on me, no matter how tight it is it slips down until I find it floating around my ankle, and there's just nowhere in my bra to put it. This I will remember.

DUCT TAPE! Is there anything it can't do?

LOL, that WAS very MacGyverish!!

Whatever it takes to wear the perfect little black dress, do it, and you did!!

You are AWESOME!
As I read your post, I could hear the cheesy Macguyver music, picture the sweat on his brow, and envision the ever present red glow from the ticking bomb....
Have a great day!

Wow, MacGyver! I loved his show and his mullet...

Sometimes when I'm trying to fit the pump into a dress, I stick it on the side of my bra, under the armpit part. It sounds weird, but it does work. I hate thinking that I will have to sacrifice fashion for diabetes. It hasn't got me yet!

hey kerri

thanks for the comment. you are my first on my new blog. he he he :)

should be getting our computer sorted on sunday.

c ya vic xxxxxx

That was so awesome! Mac and BA Barrakis (Mr. T in the A-team) would so get whooped by you!

"if you can't fix it, Duct it!"

Am I the only one that thought duct tape was "duck tape" as a child?!

Very creative Kerri!

A friend on Diabetic Mommy puts hers in her panty hose. Can even access it through the hose without having to take it out.

next time stick the sucker into the side of your bra under your arm pit area, its my new spot noone can ever tell where it is there.

I definitely thought it was "duck tape" until ... I think, yesterday.

And wearing it in the armpit area of my bra is so uncomfortable for me! How do you wear it without feeling it?

I think duct tape WAS the original convertible bra....
Good work Kerri, It's more fun to be a slave to fashion than to the pump. Hope you enjoyed the premiere.

I really admire you guys for fifuring out theses solutions - I have given up trying to hide the pump. I do not wear a bra - so that is hopeless. My boobs are just too little to hide the pump there. These bicycle shorts - do they show through a tight skirt?????? I am kind of thin, so a huge "pump lump" is going to show. Dresses seem out for me. I haven't worn one in 2 years since I got the pump. With a skirt you can wear the pump visible at the waist on a velcro stretch band or a belt. I cannot figure out how you do all this hiding!

Hi, Kerri. Your story (and its frustrations) cracked me up and brought some funny memories to mind. 1) A lovely halter dress and the stinking, awful velcro holster sliding, sliding down my thigh and calf while at a winery. I got the giggles as my husband tried to shield me as I gracefully limped to the bathroom with the tubing wrapping around my calve, and worried the whole time that we'd get kicked out of the winery before we got to try any wine. 2) Being at a wedding reception, dancing. The reception was at hotel and we had to seek out the maintenance man in search of...duct tape!

Isn't it fun?? :-)

Nicely done, Kerri.

Hope you had a fabulous evening.

I feel your pain, boy do I. Good job working out a solution.

Good Thinking Kerri! I too hope you had an enjoyable evening....

I have also used control top nylons. I cut the legs off, and just wear the "contol" part. I stick the pump in were is the least obvious, and it usually stays there. It's cheaper than bike shorts.

oh it reminds me of a couple of years ago when i graduted - my mom had bought me this really cute dress to wear under my gown and i had just went on the pump exactly one week before. i got all dressed - hooked up my pump - couldn't find any where to put it and threw a fit. i cried hysterically and declared that i was NOT absolutely NOT graduating. i didn't care anymore. there was no way in hell that i was going to go to graduation. so as i stood in the middle of my living room with all my relatives (that i barely even knew) watching me i cried like a little baby and screamed at everyone telling them all to go to hell because i was not going to graduation ... well low and behold my mom came up with some sort of brillant idea ... and i went to graduation. (with a tear stained face) - if only i had known then how many more of those moments i would have ... lol i can only laugh now.

* ok i just re-read what i wrote and i apologize for my horrible english and grammer - i'll blame it on the fact that it's 3:58am - sorry loves *

Awsome way to go ha love to come up with new contraptions you should paten it ha ha

Can you patent this? Or send me an actual diagram? I may even consider the pump if I can still wear my sexy clothes.

Hun, next time your Velcro seems to be dying from the sub-lethal flocking problem, then get a pair of long-nosed fine-tipped tweezers, and when you're sitting there with your favorite television or radio or podcast program, pick out the fuzzy bits and string crap from the hooks part of the Velcro. That cures it most every time.


Found you via Grand Rounds. GREAT post. I will share it with one of my postpartum mama clients who wears a pump. :)


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