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Starbucks.

She waddled up to me, breathing entirely from her nose and leaning heavily on the countertop.

“Excuse me?  I just had a C-section a few days ago and I’m not feeling very well,” She blew her nose on her handkerchief.

Not CheapI was waiting at the counter at Starbucks for my pretentious grande-sized (read: medium) non-fat chai tea.  Three dollars and fifty cents.  About the price of a gallon of gas.  What a racket, this coffee thing.

“Um, … okay.  Are you okay?  Do you need help?”  I asked.

“Yeah.  My husband works over at the courthouse and I need to call him but I left my cell phone at home and there isn’t a pay phone anywhere near here and I can’t walk very far.  Can I use your cell phone?”

“Sure thing.  Let me just go over to my table and grab it.  It’s right over th…”

She frowned and gestured towards my jeans pocket.

“No, your cell phone?  Is that okay?”  She blew her nose again and pointed again at my pocket.  Where my pump was clipped.

“Oh, this isn’t a cell phone.  Listen, my cell phone is right over there and I’ll just go grab it…”

She frowned again.  “It looks like a cell phone.”

“It’s not.  It’s an insulin pump.  I’m a diabetic.”

Raised eyebrow.

“Instead of taking insulin injections, I wear this device and it routes the insulin into my body directly.  Much easier than all the shots.”  Smiled to diffuse the situation.

Silence from my C-Section Friend.

"I like it. Never seen one of those before.”  She blew her nose again. 

I trotted off to retrieve my cell phone and she waddled off to make the phone call to her husband.  As her phone conversation escalated and the entire Starbucks heard her hollering at her husband at the courthouse – “I had a freakin’ C-Section for your enormous baby and all I want is for you to come and pick me the f*@% up!” – I smiled at the opportunities to educate others that diabetes affords me.

It’s cheaper to educate than to buy a cup of chai, that’s for damn sure.

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Comments

At least she didn't give you the glassy eyed stare and change the subject after you told her about the pump or about anything having to do with diabetes. I know that scenario all too well.

The day after mothers day! Wow, that is terrible.

It feels good to educate people about the big D, that is for sure.

Just another addition for my long list of reasons why Roma is better than Starbucks. We have the cool crazies, not the scary crazies. :-) Oh, and it's cheaper (but that was already on the list).

But it's nice that she thought your pump was cool instead of going all "Ew, yucky, medical equipment."

She was one crazy lady. I love the Starbucks Wackos. They are a breed unto themselves and well worth the price of admission. There was this one time that a guy walked in, started ranting about the repression of the Dominican baseball players, grabbed a coffee (hopefully decaf) and went screaming out the door. Nor ... mal?

Crazy Lady actually strolled off with my cell phone for five minutes. I thought I was going to have to tackle her to get it back.

But yes, she did give me an almost normal response to my pump. After she realized she couldn't make an outgoing call from it, that is. Incoming calls only.

This is one reason that Starbucks is a great place if you unexpectedly find you need to change an infusion set while you're out. You can sit down, have a drink and change your set... and you appear totally normal!

I'm probably more inclined to lend people my insulin pump than my phone. At least my pump is attached to me, and they can't wander off with it ;-)

Thanks for making me smile!

Funny. I wonder what she would have done if you actually gave her your pump...hehe!

Picture the folks from 15+ years ago wearing pumps (cue picture of that guy wearing the backpack thing - you all know the picture I'm sure...)

I wonder what the conversations were like back then?

Who woulda thought...

I think we'll see many fun and exciting tools and advances in the very near future.

I can't believe her husband wasn't there for it, and was refusing to pick her up.

Her inexplicable cynicism had educational value. I like her.

Very, very funny.

Thanks, Kerri. One of my favorite things about going to Starbucks is the fine people-watching opportunities the trip affords.

This was a good one :-)

Thanks for my first real laugh today - !
I love your writing so much.
Wish me luck - My 4 year old son starts the pump, minimed 522, tomorrow~
Might be asking you for inspiration - or your mom.

:)
Mary ELlen

hey that's a cool story. felt sorry for the lady in the discomfort and even more sorry for her husband!! he he :) i've shown so many people my insulin pump, and it's normally mistaken for an ipod.

my nephew decided to investigate for him self took it off my trousers and tried to run off with it, and out came my set. you see i never realized he had got it off. just though he was messing around with a toy or something.

Wow, sounds like this woman's child is starting life in a war zone. Good for you Kerri for slipping a little D education in there. Just curious, how many weekly visits to starbucks make one a starbucks wacko? I'm asking for a friend of course ;-)

Mary Ellen - Good luck to you and your son with your pumping adventure tomorrow! If there is anything I can offer to help you guys out, please feel free to email me.

And Carol, I'm not sure how many weekly visits to Starbucks constitutes a bona fide wacko, but I'd guess if you're there the day or two after your C-Section and you're battling with your husband on someone else's cell phone, you've achieved Bona Fidedom.

Not sure if that's a word...

Wow and I thought only odd things people happen to me great story well interesting anyway

Very funny story Kerri. Good for you on educating the masses (no matter how crazy they are, lol).

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